This is the Transcript for VeggieTales Live! Sing Yourself Silly.
Transcript[]
(We fade in to a white screen. Big Idea Presents shows up)
Bob: (O.S.) Come on everybody, time for the show, L-Larry!
Larry: (O.S.) Woohoo! This is going to be the best show ever! I just love the people in this town! They always sing and clap the loudest.
(The VeggieTales logo appears then the words Live and Sing Yourself Silly. The full title reveals, VeggieTales Live! Silly Yourself Silly)
Bob: (O.S.) Well, they can't do anything unless we get out there.
Larry: (O.S.) I can't find the stage, my head's stuck in this hat.
(Thump!)
Larry: (O.S.) Ow! I trapped over a huge pillow.
(We transition to a human named Suzie on the stage pacing around)
Jimmy: (O.S.) I'm not a pillow!
Larry: (O.S.) Oops, sorry Jimmy.
Suzie: Bob, Larry, the audience is waiting.
Bob: (O.S.) Sorry Suzie, Larry's having costume trouble.
Suzie: Oh sure.
Larry: (O.S.) And Bob overslept.
Suzie: Okay, I-
Bob: (O.S.) My pre-show nap is very important.
Suzie: Well guys come on out. That is if the audience is ready. Are you guys ready?!
(The audience cheers)
Suzie: Great!, Roll it!
(The VeggieTales Theme Song starts playing)
Suzie: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Veggies of all ages, Welcome to the VeggieTales Top Ten Silly Song Countdown!
(Bob makes his entrance as Suzie leaves the stage)
Bob: If you like to talk to tomatoes
If a squash can make you smile
If you like to waltz with potatoes
Up and down the produce aisle....
Have we got a show for you!
(Junior, Pa Grape, Jimmy, Jerry, and Mr. Lunt enter the stage)
Singers: VeggieTales! (x8)
Bob: Broccoli, celery, gotta be...
Singers: VeggieTales!
Junior: Lima beans, collard greens, peachy keen...
Singers: VeggieTales!
Bob (with Larry's voice): Cauliflower, sweet and sour, half an hour...
Singers: VeggieTales!
There's never ever ever ever ever ever been a show like VeggieTales
There's never ever ever ever ever ever been a show like VeggieTales
It's time for VeggieTales!
(Applause and then Pa Grape and Mr. Lunt leave)
Bob: Hi kids, I'm Bob the Tomato. Uh, I said I'm Bob the Tomato?
Jimmy: And I'm Larry the Cucumber.
Bob: What? No you're not! You're Jimmy Gourd!
Jimmy: I know, I'm acting.
Bob: But they don't want somebody to act like Larry, they want Larry, am I right? Do you wanna see Larry?
(Audience cheers)
Jimmy: Larry is currently stuck in a cowboy hat.
Bob: (sighs) Terrific.
Jimmy: So I suggest you use you're imagination and watch in awe as I wow this audience.
Bob: Um okay, so Larry welcome to the Silly Song Top Ten!
Chorus: Silly Song Top Ten!
Jimmy: Why thanks Bob, ever since I was a little green Gherkin, I've always dreamed of singing and dancing for a live audience. Just ask my friend, Jimmy Gourd!
Junior: That's right Larry, Jimmy Gourd here! And I remember when we were kids and we used to dance around the kitchen sink!
Bob: Wait a second, you're not Jimmy, you're Junior.
Junior: Yes, but I'm acting like Jimmy while Jimmy's acting like Larry. Try and keep up Bob!
Jimmy; Ah, those were the days back when we were on “Veggies on Ice!”.
Bob: I didn't know you could skate.
Jimmy: Who said anything about skating? Yhat's how we stayed fresh.
(Audience laughter)
Bob: Good grief. Can we get on with the countdown?
Larry: (O.S) I'm ready now!
Bob: Finally.
Junior: Here's your number ten Silly Song!
Chorus: Number 10!
Bob and Jimmy: The Water Buffalo Song!
(The Water Buffalo Song starts playing as Suzie and the rest of her cast members started coming on stage dressed in cowboy/cowgirl clothes to dance and sing along with Larry)
Larry: Everybody's got a water buffalo.
Yours is fast but mine was slow.
Oh where'd we get them? I don't know.
But everybody's got a water buffalo-oooooooooo.
I took my buffalo to the store,
Got his head stuck in the door.
Spilled some lima beans on the floor.
Oh, everybody's got a water buffalo-ooooooooo.
(Instrumental break)
(Archibald enters the stage)
Larry: Everybody's got a water buffalo.
Yours is fast but mine was slow.
Oh, where'd we get them? I don't know
But everybody's got a water buffalo-ooooooooo.
Archibald: Stop it! Stop! Stop right this instant! What do you think you're doing? You can't say everyone's got a water buffalo when everyone does not have a water buffalo! We're going to get nasty letters saying, "Where's my water buffalo?" "Why don't I have a water buffalo?" And are you prepared to deal with that? I don't think so! Stop being so silly!
Suzie: But u-uh Archie, we have to be silly.
Larry: Yeah, this is the Silly Song Top Ten.
Chorus: Top Ten!
Archibald: Not anymore.
Suzie: What?
Archibald: Too much silliness! I now declare this evening the Top Ten Lesson Songs of All Time!
Chorus: Top Ten!
Larry: What's the difference between a Lesson Song and a Silly Song?
Archibald: A lesson song has something to say. Like this huge veggie hit from 1995. Hit it, Junior!
(Big Things Too starts playing as Junior would enter the stage. Larry and Suzie would leave the stage)
Junior: Your big, I'm little.
My head only come to your middle.
But I say little guys can do big things too!.
Archibald: Yes but Goliath, he's-
Junior: He's big, but God's bigger.
And when I think of him that's when I figure.
With his help little guys can do big things too!.
He's big but God's bigger.
And when I think of him that's when I figure.
Archibald: With his help little guys can do big things?.
Junior: With his help I know I can do big things!.
Both: With his help little guys can do big things tooo!.
(Jimmy enters the stage)
(Instrumental jazz break and cheers erupting from the audience)
Jimmy: Uhm, What just happened? That song wasn't silly at all.
Suzie: Yeah, Archie changed the show.
Jerry: We can change the show? Awesome!
Suzie: Uh n-n-n-n no, no you can't! Neither can Archie! The show's been decided on! It's the Silly Song Top Ten!
Chorus: Top Ten!
Archibald: No, it's the Lesson Song Top Ten!
Suzie: Archie-
Chorus: Top Ten!
Jimmy: Did you hear that Jerry? We get to chose our own Top Ten.
Chorus: Top Ten!
Suzie: No wait stop! No guys you don't! The show's been decided on! We've had rehearsals!
Jimmy: Rehearsals shemerals, kids, it's time for the Top Ten Hits from The 80's!
Suzie: But Jimmy, I really-
Jimmy: No buts! Coming in at Number 7!
Chorus: Number 7!
Suzie: Uh, we haven't done 9 or 8 yet.
Chorus: 9 or 8!
Jimmy: Is a Jimmy and Jerry favorite, stand up and dance!.
Suzie: Guys really- uh this is awkward-.
(Gourds Just Wanna Have Fun starts playing as Suzie leaves the stage. A group of dancers in aerobic clothing started to dance along with the gourds)
Jimmy: We wake up in the morning light.
Our mommy says, "Boys, are you feeling alright?"
Oh, mommy, dear, we love being your sons,
and gourds they wanna have fun
oh gourds just wanna have fun
Jerry: Yeah we love having fun
Jimmy: We sure do
Jerry: We love eating too. Eating is fun
Jimmy: Eating is great
Jerry: Daddy brings ice cream home tonight.
We wish we had hands so we could give him high-5's.
Oh, daddy, dear, you know you're still number one.
And gourds they wanna have fun.
Oh Gourds just wanna have-
Jimmy: That's all they really want
Jerry: Is some fun!
Both: When the wheeltop day is done
Jerry: oh Gourds they wanna have fun. (Jimmy: oh yes we do!)
Oh Gourds just wanna have fun!
Jimmy: Gourds they wanna! Wanna have fun! Gourds! Wanna have!
Jerry: Okay, Jimmy, you play the xylophone.
Jimmy: Alright! Here I go!
Jerry: Woo!
Jimmy: Ho ho!
Jerry: This is fun!
Jimmy: I'm Xylophony!
Jerry: Alright!
Jimmy: Haha! Haha! Someday I'll take my family of gourds
and travel to see the best of the world
Jerry: I wanna be the one to hop in the sun.
Oh Gourds they wanna have fun.
Oh just wanna have.
Jimmy: That's all they really want
Jerry: Is some fun!
Both: When the wheeltop day is done
Jerry: oh Gourds they wanna have fun.
Oh Gourds just wanna have fun!
Jimmy: Gourds they wanna! Wanna have fun! Gourds! Wanna have!
Both: They Just wanna (x6) (Jimmy or Jerry: Gourds Gourds just wanna have fun!) (repeat)
Jerry then both Jimmy and Jerry: When the Wheeltop day is done, (x3) Oh Gourds
Jerry: Gourds Just wanna have fun. Come on everybody. Up! Up!
Both: They Just wanna (x6) (Jimmy or Jerry: Gourds Gourds just wanna have fun!)
Jerry then Jimmy and Jerry: When the workin...
When the working day is done.
Oh when the working day is done. (repeats until song fades out)
(Applause is heard and then Larry enters the stage followed by Suzie and Archibald)
Suzie: Oh, hey.
Jimmy: What a wonderful song.
Larry: Well sure! But it wasn't very silly.
Archibald: And it didn't have a lesson.
Larry: And it wasn't about Cucumbers.
Suzie: Well no song can be about everything.
Larry: Unless it has a whole lotta words.
Archibald: There must be a way to agree here!
Suzie: Yeah, but we better get a move on because these boys and girls are waiting.
Larry: They're not waiting for me. I was just doing the Silly Song show when these guys-
Archibald: (clears throat) Lesson Songs.
Suzie: This was supposed to be the Top Ten Silly Song countdown.
Archibald: Clearly I'm right.
Larry: I'm right.
Suzie: See I'm right, I knew we'd agree.
Archibald: What?
Larry: Huh?
Suzie: Well now I'm confused. Larry, what should we do?
Larry: The same thing we always do when we can't come to an agreement.
Suzie: What's that?
Larry: We watch my Vacation Slides!
Archibald and Suzie: Oh brother.
Suzie: Well, it is a Silly Song although it's not in the countdown. Huh! Ladies and gentlemen, number nine and a half!
Chorus: Nine and a half!
Suzie: Where is that coming from...?
{Song of the Cebu would start up as Larry now faces the screen dancing)
Announcer: And now it's time for Silly Songs with Larry — the part of the show where Larry comes out and sings a silly song.
(The audience claps along to the beat and Larry is now shown smiling)
Announcer (cont'd): Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! Larry the Cucumber presents, in a sequential image, stereophonic, multimedia event: The Song of the Cebú!
Larry: Cebú!
(As Larry speaks, he shows corresponding hand-drawn slides depicting what he describes.)
Larry (cont'd): This is a song about a boy. A song about a little boy and his cebús. A song about a little boy and his three cebús. The little boy who had a sick cebú, a sad cebú, and a mute cebú. … And also a hippo.
(Larry’s slides begin to show his vacation photos instead.)
Larry (cont'd): Um... um... this is me at the airport. This is my Aunt Ruth. This is me at a bullfight. This is me fighting a bull!
(Junior, Jimmy and Jerry are now seen)
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Ooh!
Larry: This is me and the bull.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Ahh!
(The slide shows a photo of a bandaged and bruised Larry, the bull, and a cebú who looks like the sick cebú in Larry's drawing.)
Larry: This is me and the bull and … I think that's the bull's cousin. He's a cebú!
(Larry continues to show blank slides as Archibald enters from behind the projector screen.)
Archibald: Hold it! You call this a multimedia event? This is a slide projector and a bed sheet! And what on Earth is a Cebú, anyway?
Larry: It's kind of like a cow...
(Larry shows a slide of a drawing comparing a cow to a Cebú)
Larry (cont'd): See?
Archibald: Yes. Well, very good. This could be interesting. Carry on!
(Archibald leaves.)
Larry: Cebú!
Sing it with me!
Cebú!
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Cebú!
(The screen shows slides of the boy riding with his three Cebú in a canoe)
Larry: Boy is riding with Cebú
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Boy is riding with Cebú
Larry: Into town in his canoe
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Into town in his canoe
Larry: Sick Cebú is rowing and sneezing.
Achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo moo moo.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo moo moo.
(The screen shows slides of the Hippo chewing on bamboo shoots.)
Larry: Hippo chewing on bamboo
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Hippo chewing on bamboo
Larry: Can't see boy and three Cebú
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Can't see boy and three Cebú
Larry: Sad Cebú is rowing and crying.
Boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo moo moo.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo moo moo.
Larry: Cebú!
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Cebú!
Larry: Cebú!
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Cebú!
All: Achoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, achoo moo moo, boo-hoo moo moo, Cebú!
(Sheet shows a drawing of the Mute Cebú turning his attention towards the Hippo.)
Larry: Hippo seen by Mute Cebú.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Hippo seen by Mute Cebú.
Larry: Tries to tell the other two.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Tries to tell the other two.
Larry: Mute Cebú is waving and grunting Mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm mmm mmm.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm, mmm-hmm mmm mmm mmm mmm.
Larry: Uh-oh.
(Archibald re-enters, now very invested in the song.)
Archibald: Wait! What happens next?
Larry: Um ...
Archibald: Does the hippo see them? Is the poor Mute Cebú successful in communicating the imminent danger to the other passengers? Is the boy injured? Why is the Sad Cebú sad? Is the canoe wood or aluminum?
(Larry continues fixing the slide projector until it displays a new photo.)
Larry: Oh look!
(The photo shows him at Sea World, with The Peach in the background wearing scuba gear. A dolphin is playing with Bob by tossing the poor tomatoes in the air.)
Larry (cont'd): There's me and Bob at Sea World!
(He displays another photo, which is a previous one, showing him and the bull.)
Larry (cont'd): There's me and that bull again.
Archibald: You can't just start a song and leave it hanging like that!
(Screen shows the photo of Larry and his Aunt Ruth again.)
Archibald (cont'd): You know, I've come to expect a lot more from you.
(Screen shows the first drawing of the boy again.)
Archibald (cont'd): This is quite disappointing!
(Sheet shows the photo of Larry and Bob at the airport again.)
Archibald (cont'd): I'm going to have to speak to Bob about this.
(Sheet shows a drawing of a bovine looking animal.)
Larry: Oh look! A cebú!
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: Cebú!
Larry: No, wait. ... That's a water buffalo.
Junior, Jimmy and Jerry: No more song about Cebú!
Need another verse or two!
Audience is standing and leaving,
Bye-bye moo, bye-bye moo, bye-bye moo, bye-bye moo moo moo moo.
Jimmy: I want my money back!
Jerry: Yeah. That'd be … That'd be good.
(Song ends and the audience cheers once again as Suzie and Archibald enter the stage, followed by Bob)
Suzie: You should stay here.
(Jerry leaves the stage)
Bob: Nice job, Larry!
Archibald: No fair, Suzie! Larry snuck in a extra Silly Song!
Bob: Suzie, what's going on? Are you and Larry being fair?
Suzie: Well, why should I have to be fair? This is my show!
Larry: Our show.
Suzie: Our show, but I'm the host and we've been working on this for months and it's supposed to be, well silly!
Bob: But shouldn't we all be working together?
Archibald: An important point.
Suzie: But I really think that-
Archibald: And after all, isn't the point of VeggieTales to teach our audience lessons?
Larry: Yes, but with silliness!
Suzie: And apparently an 80's beat.
Bob: Well, what if you share the show.
Larry: What?
Suzie: What do you mean?
Bob: Well God tells us in the bible to do nothing out of selfish ambition, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.
Larry: That's in Philippians.
Suzie: That's right Larry, it is in Philippians.
Bob: There are lots of songs in the Top Ten show, right?
Larry: At least ten.
Suzie: Only ten.
Bob: What if you share the show?
Suzie: Share the show?
Bob: Wouldn't that be less selfish, so that everyone gets a chance to do their favorite kinds songs?
Suzie: Yeah, I don't know about that Bob.
Larry: Hey, that's a great idea!
Suzie: Guys, I'm not so sure about this.
Larry: As a matter of fact, we can do more than share the show, we can share songs.
Archibald: Share songs?
Suzie: How do you share songs?
Larry: With a song that's silly, but also has a lesson, like the one that teaches Spanish. You know the one, roll it!
Suzie: Sharing songs? Huh.
(Dance Of The Cucumber started playing as Archibald and Suzie leave the stage)
Announcer: Larry will be performing the traditional Argentinian ballad, "The Dance of the Cucumber", in its original Spanish. Bob the Tomato will translate.
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Bob: Okay, stop the music! What do you mean I can't dance? I can dance! What about Uncle Louie's polka party? Didn't you see me dancing at Uncle Louie's polka party?
Larry: No comprendo.
Bob: "No comprendo"? I'll show you "no comprendo"!
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Bob: Alright, that's it, señor! Come over here and let me sing you a song!
(Applause is heard. Suzie enters the stage)
Suzie: Uhh, I don't think Archie would consider that a sharing type song, Bob. That was a little bit of lesson with a whole lot of Silly, just the way it should be.
(Larry enters the stage again)
Larry: That was a huge lesson, now everybody knows a pepino is a cucumber. What could be a better lesson than that?
Suzie: Practically everything, oh this is simply turning into a disaster! Lesson Songs? Silly Songs? 80's Songs? All in the Top Ten Silly Song Countdown? Have we shared enough, Bob?
Bob: Well, Suzie, that's not really sharing, is it?
Suzie: Huh?
Bob: Sharing isn't about figuring out how much you can get and giving a little bit you don't care about. I know it's hard but why don't you try?
Suzie: Okay, what song should we do next?
Bob: Well, how about a song that teaches us how much god cares for us? That's the lesson. And has just a pinch of silly.
Suzie: I've got a great idea! Hey, Pa! Junior!
(Suzie signals Junior and Pa Grape to come to the stage)
Junior: What's up, Suzie?
Suzie: Can you guys help us with the next song?.
Pa Grape: But uh, I was already helping Jimmy with a sandwich.
Suzie: Jimmy can make his own sandwich.
Pa Grape: I wasn't helping him make it, I was helping him eat it.
Suzie: Hey Junior, remember way back in the day when you were scared to go to sleep?
Junior: Do I ever? That was back when I was a little boy.
Pa Grape: Oy vey.
(God is Bigger starts)
Bob: God is bigger than the boogie man.
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV.
Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man
and He's watching out for you and me.
Junior: So when I'm lying in my bed
and the furniture starts creeping,
I'll just laugh and say "Hey! Cut that out!"
and get back to my sleeping
Cause I know that God's the biggest,
and He's watching all the while.
So when I get scared, I'll think of Him
and close my eyes and smile!
Suzie: That's right, Junior.
Bob, Junior, Pa Grape, and Suzie: God is bigger than the boogie man.
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV.
Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man,
and He's watching out for you and me.
Monster #1: So are you frightened?
Junior: No not really!
Monster #2: Are you worried?
Junior: Not a bit!
I know whatever's gonna happen, that God can handle it!
Pa Grape: I'm sorry you were frightened by that monster in your dream.
Junior: Well that's okay, cause now I know that God is taking care of me!
Pa Grape: Everybody sing!
Everyone: God is bigger than the boogie man.
He's bigger than Godzilla and the monsters on TV.
Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man,
and He's watching out for you and me.
Junior: One more time!
Everyone: God is bigger than the boogie man.
He's bigger than Godzilla and the monsters on TV.
Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man
and He's watching out for you and me. He's watching out for you and me.
Monster #1: Watching,
Monster #2: watching,
Monster #3: watching!
Junior: Out for you and me, Yeah!
{Cheers and claps erupted from the audience)
Suzie: Great job, guys! Hey thanks, Junior!
Junior: No problem! Bye, everyone!
Pa Grape: Hey Jimmy, you better have saved the last bite of that sandwich!
(Junior, Bob, and Pa Grape leave the stage)
Suzie: Aaah I guess that wasn't so hard. Just as long as it doesn't happen too much during the show. If we keep sharing the show, there still won't be enough show left for 7 more silly songs-
Chorus: 7 more silly songs!
Suzie: Right. (laughs) 7 more silly songs because this is the Top Ten! (silence) I said it was the Top Ten!
Chorus: Top Ten!
Suzie: Great! We've only done 3. So uh. Uh 10 minus 3 is..
Chorus: 7!
Suzie: Woah! 7. Right. And if I'm not mistaken number 7-
Chorus: 7!
Suzie: (laughs) If I'm not mistaken, number 7...
(His Cheeseburger begins and the title card appears on a screen)
Suzie: Aah. It's my favorite song. (She sees a Burger Bell prop with a clown on it and screams) That's uh. That's a big clown. Haha. Okay
(Suzie leaves)
(Mr. Lunt then enters wearing a Burger Bell hat. Applause and cheers are heard)
Mr. Lunt: He said to her, "I'd like a cheeseburger...
And I might like a milkshake as well..."
She said to him, "I can't give you either."
And he said, "Isn't this Burger Bell?"
She said, "Yes it is but we're closed now, but we open tomorrow at ten."
He said, "I am extremely hungry, but I guess I can wait until then."
'Cause you're his cheeseburger!
His yummy cheeseburger!
He'll wait for you.
Yeah! He'll wait for you.
Oh, you are his cheeseburger!
His tasty cheeseburger.
He'll wait for you.
Oh, he will wait for you.
(Two people enter the stage dressed up as ketchup and mustard with mics and provide backup vocals)
Mr. Lunt: He stayed at the drive-thru till sunrise.
He may have dozed off once or twice.
When he spotted a billboard for Denny's –
Bacon and eggs for half price!
How could he resist such an offer?
He really needed something to munch.
Cheeseburger, please do not get angry.
He'll eat and be back here for lunch!
Cause you're his cheeseburger!
His precious cheeseburger!
Be back for you! He'll be back for you!
Won't be so long cheeseburger!
Oh lovely cheeseburger!
Be back for you!
Oh, he'll be back for you.
Cause he loves you cheeseburger with all his heart!
And there ain't nothin' gonna tear you two apart!
And if the world suddenly ran out of cheese,
He would get down on his hands and knees,
To see if someone accidentally dropped some cheese in the dirt.
And he would wash it off for you!
Wipe it off for you!
Clean that dirty cheese off just for you...
You are his cheeseburger.
(Applause and cheers are heard. Larry and Suzie enter the stage)
Larry: Mr. Lunt, that was awesome!
Suzie: Ah I love it!
Larry: I had no idea you were helping us with our Top Ten Silly Songs!
Mr. Lunt: Silly Songs? I thought I was doing the Top Ten Songs about Food.
Suzie: Food?
Mr. Lunt: Sure! Cheeseburgers, Pizza Angels, Moo-Shoo, Chocolate bunnies. I could go on and on!
Suzie: Well that's just it! Silly Songs, Lessons Song and now songs about food? Mr. Lunt, I can't-
Mr. Lunt: Oh and those great songs from the 80's!
Just wanna they just wanna! Gourds!
Gourds just want to have fun!
Suzie: Oh this isn't really too much. I just wanted to do a silly song show so maybe I could feel a little silly. Well do I look like I feel silly to you?! (gasps) Oh Mr. Lunt, I am sorry. That wasn't towards you.
Archibald: What's all the hubba?
Larry: Here's the hubba bubb! I think we need a little silliness...Stat!
Archibald: I suppose a little silliness here and there couldn't hurt. But then it's back to the lessons. I think it's important to emphasize the importanc-
Larry: Well why didn't you say so? Ladies and gentlemen, number 6!
Chorus: Number 6!
Larry: "I Love My Lips!."
If my lips ever left my mouth,
Packed a bag and headed south,
That'd be too bad.
I'd be so sad.
Archibald: I see ... that'd be too bad.
You'd be so sad ...
Larry: ... That'd be too bad!
Archibald: Alrighty.
Larry: If my lips said, "¡Adios!
I don't like you; I think you're gross!"
That'd be too bad.
I might get mad.
Archibald: Hmm ... that'd be too bad.
You might get mad ...
Larry: ... That'd be too bad!
Archibald: Fascinating!
Larry: If my lips moved to Duluth,
Left a mess and took my tooth,
That'd be too bad.
I'd call my dad.
Archibald: Oh dear! That'd be too bad.
You'd call your dad ...
Larry: ... That'd be too bad!
Archibald: Hold it! Did you say your father? Fascinating ... So what you're saying is, if your lips left you ...
Larry: That'd be too bad.
I'd be so sad!
I might get mad.
I'd call my dad!
That be too bad.
Archibald: ... That'd be too bad?
Larry: ... That'd be too bad.
Archibald: Why?
Larry: 'Cuz I love my lips!
(scatting) Boodle de boop bop...
Archibald: Oh my ... This is more serious than I thought. Larry, what do you see here?
Larry: Umm ... That looks like a lip.
Archibald: What about this?
Larry: It's a lip!
Archibald: And this?
Larry: (To the tune of William Tell Overture) It's a lip; It's a lip; It's a lip, lip, lip!
It's a lip; It's a lip; It's a lip, lip, lip!
It's a lip; It's a lip; It's a lip, lip, lip!
Liiiiiiiiiiiips!
Lip, lip, lip!
Archibald: Larry ... Tell me about your childhood.
Larry: When I was just two years old.
I left my lips out in the cold
And they turned blue!
What could I do?
Archibald: Oh dear. They turned blue ...
What could you do? ...
Larry: Oh, they turned blue!
Archibald: I see.
Larry: On the day I got my tooth,
I had to kiss my great Aunt Ruth.
She had a beard;
And it felt weird!
Archibald: My, my! She had a beard;
And it felt weird?
Larry: She had a beard!
Archibald: Oh!
Larry: Ten days after I turned eight,
Got my lips stuck in a gate!
My friends all laughed ...
... And I just stood there until the fire department came and broke the lock with a crow bar and I had to spend the next six weeks in lip rehab with this kid named Oscar who got stung by a bee right on the lip and we couldn't even talk to each other until the fifth week 'cuz both of our lips were so swollen and when he did start speaking he just spoke Polish and I only knew like three words in Polish except now I know four because Oscar taught me the word for lip. "Usta."
Archibald: Your friends all laughed ... "usta"... how do you spell that?
Larry: I don't know.
Archibald: So what you're saying, is that when you were young ...
Larry: They turned blue!
What could I do?
She had a beard
And it felt weird!
My friends all laughed ...
"Usta!"
Archibald: I'm confused.
Larry: I love my lips!
(scatting) Boodle de boop bop...
Archibald: Larry ... Larry? ... That's enough now. Thank you ...
(Applause is heard and Suzie comes out)
Suzie: I just really wanna talk about this-
Larry: There you go Suzie, all better.
Suzie: But I don't wanna wear the fluffy bunny ears grandma.
Archibald: Oh dear, I do believe she's snapped. Gone bonkers, cucokoo! All squishy inside. I'll go get help.
Suzie: Stand up for chocolate sports unity vehicle!
Larry: Well this won't work. We've still got the Top Five to finish.
Chorus: Top Five to finish!
Larry: I think Suzie needs a break before she breaks. Come on, let's get you a chair.
Suzie: Chairs are good, chairs are silly, silly is good.
(Larry gets Suzie to go offstage)
Larry: Now this is only gonna work if everyone gets up on their feet with us!
(We now cut to Mr Lunt, a group of pirates and Pa Grape on stage)
Mr. Lunt: Did somebody say don't do anything?
Pa Grape: Er, nobody said anything.
Mr. Lunt: Exactly, nobody said nothing.
(Larry comes out wearing a beard and eyepatch)
Mr. Lunt: Double negitive, which means somebody said anything, which we don't do.
Pa Grape: Oy..
Larry: Suzie's still resting. So we thought we keep the countdown going. The Countdown of Silly Songs!
Chorus: Silly Song Countdown!
Mr. Lunt: That may or may not be about food!
Larry: Number 5!
Chorus: Number 5!
(The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything remix begins)
Mr. Lunt: And look! Bubbles!
Larry: It's a special effect. Kind makes it look like we're underwater.
Mr. Lunt: But pirates don't go underwater.
Pa Grape: Unless they aren't very good at sailing. Which we are not.
Larry: Right. After all..
All three: We are The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
We just stay home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you...
Larry: We don't do anything!
Pa Grape: Well, I've never been to Greenland and I've never been to Denver
And I've never buried treasure in St. Louis or St. Paul
And I've never been to Moscow and I've never been to Tampa
And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
All: Cuz we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
We just stay home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you...
Mr. Lunt: We don't do anything.
And I never hoist the mainstay and I never swab the poop deck
And I never veer to starboard cuz I never sail at all
And I've never walked the gang plank and I've never owned a parrot
And I've never been to Boston in the fall
All: Cuz we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
We just stay at home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you...
"We don't do anything!"
Larry: Well, I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at ping-pong
And I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall
And I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten head lice
And I've never been to Boston in the fall!
Pa Grape: Huh? What are you talking about? What's a rooster and mashed potatoes have to do with being a pirate?
Mr. Lunt: Hey, that's right! We're supposed to sing about pirate-y things!
Larry: Oh...
Pa Grape: And who's ever kissed a chipmunk? That's just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?
Mr. Lunt: I think you look like Cap'n Crunch!
Pa Grape: Huh? No I don't!
Mr. Lunt: Do too.
Pa Grape: Do not!
Mr. Lunt: You're making me hungry.
Pa Grape: That's it, you're walkin' the plank!
Mr. Lunt: Says who?
Pa Grape: Says the Captain, that's who!
Mr. Lunt: Oh, yeah? Aye aye, Cap'n Crunch! Hee hee hee hee.
Pa Grape: Arrrrgh!
Mr. Lunt: Yikes!
Larry: And I've never licked a spark plug and I've never sniffed a stink bug
And I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball
And I've never bathed in yogurt and I don't look good in leggings...
Pa Grape: You just don't get it!
All: And we've never been to Boston in the fall!
(Applause is heard and the pirate crew members head off stage)
Larry: Aw that was super fun!
Mr. Lunt: And now in honor of Silly Song number 4!
Chorus: Number 4!
Pa Grape: And so we can stall until Suzie feels a little better.
Chorus: Until Suzie feels better!
Larry: We're gonna teach you a dance!
(Suzie comes out)
Pa Grape: But we're gonna need some help.
Suzie: What's up guys?
Larry: Hey, Suzie.
Suzie: Hey.
Larry: (gasps) Suzie!
Suzie: Huh?
Larry: Are you feeling better?
(She nods yes)
Larry: You wanna help us with this song?
Suzie: Sure! Songs are good, songs are silly, silly is good!
Pa Grape: It's easy. Just help us with teach the Moo-Shoo dance.
Suzie: The Moo-Shoo? That's one of my favorites!
(Two pirate crew members come on stage as Pa Grape leaves)
Mr. Lunt: Then here we go. One, two, scoodly-doodly-do!
(Do the Moo-Shoo begins)
Suzie: Okay everybody on your feet! It's time to learn the Moo-Shoo! We start by taking two steps to the right. Here we go. (everyone takes two steps to the right) One.. two.. Throw those hands into the air! (everyone puts their hands in the hair) Now two steps to the left. (everyone moves two steps to the left) One... two... Point down! Now three funky chickens in a circle. (everyone does 3 funky chickens in a circle) One two three and point! Great job! Let's put it all together! (Everyone does all the dance moves) To the right here we go! One... two.. hands up! To the left! Point down and chicken! And Point! Great Job! Now when we do the Moo-Shoo, make sure you join in. But on the verses, I wanna see you freestyle!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Chicken!
Suzie: Let me see those moves!
Mr. Lunt: Kung Pao-
Larry: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Mongolian-
Larry: Chicken!
Suzie: Great job, guys!
Mr. Lunt: Sweet and sour-
Larry: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Cashew-
Larry: Chicken!
Suzie: Here we go!
Mr. Lunt and Larry: Do the Moo Shoo! Moo Shoo Shoo Moo Moo Shoo Moo Moo Shoo. (Suzie: Hands up! To the left!)
Moo Moo Shoo Moo Moo Moo Moo Shoo Shoo. (Suzie: Point down and chicken!)
Female Voice: Do the Moo Shoo!
Suzie: Point!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Suzie: Great job!
Larry: Mandarin-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Larry: Barbecued-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Larry: Sweet and sour-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Larry: Spicy shredded-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Suzie: Here we go!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Do the Tofu! Tofu fu T-To to T-Tofu fu. (Suzie: Hands up!)
Fo fo Tu T-To to T-Tofu
Suzie: And stop! You guys are doing a great job! Keep up that energy!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Kung Pao-
Larry the Cucumber: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Mongolian-
Larry: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Sweet and sour-
Larry: Chicken!
Mr. Lunt: Cashew-
Larry: Chicken!
Suzie: Here we go!
Mr. Lunt and Larry: Do the Moo Shoo! Moo Shoo Shoo Moo Moo Shoo Moo Moo Shoo. (Suzie: Hands up! To the left!)
Moo Moo Shoo Moo Moo Moo Moo Shoo Shoo. (Suzie: Point down and chicken!)
Female voice: Do the Moo Shoo!
Suzie: Point!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Suzie: Great job!
Larry: Mandarin-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Suzie: I see you back there!
Larry: Barbecued-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Larry: Sweet and sour-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Larry: Spicy shredded-
Mr. Lunt: Pork!
Suzie: Here we go!
Larry/Mr. Lunt: Do the Tofu! Tofu fu T-To to T-Tofu fu.
Fo fo Tu T-To to T-Tofu
Suzie: And stop! You did a great job you guys! Give yourselves a hand
(The audience applauds)
Mr. Lunt: If you have hands.
(Mr. Lunt, Larry and the 2 pirate crew members head off stage as Junior comes on stage)
Junior: Um, Suzie? Hey Suzie!
Suzie: Hey Junior, what's up?
Junior: I was just thinking of a song we could do for the show!
Suzie: Well there's only 3 silly songs left in the countdown but I-
Chorus: 3 Silly songs in the-
Suzie: No wait stop! But I think we have time for one more. Is it a silly song?
Junior: Not exactly.
Suzie: Is it a song about food? 80s?
Junior: Nope.
Suzie: Pirates?
Junior: Nuh-uh.
Suzie: Well then it must be a-
Junior: Yep! It's a lesson song! Bob said you were sharing the show now! But I'm gonna need your help!
Suzie: Well then I think we should stick to the countdown cause what if I don't know this song?
Junior: Aw it's easy, Suzie.
Suzie: Okay.
Junior: Remember the rumor weed?
(Two people come out on the stage)
Suzie: Well sure. And why?
Junior: And guess what?
Suzie: What?
Junior: You're the rumor weed!
(The two people take Suzie offstage)
Suzie: Well I don't think.. I. Uhh..
(The W's version of the Rumor Weed song plays)
Suzie: Have you heard the one about Alfred?
A dangerous robot, I'm told
He's got lasers for eyes and a microchip brain
And his skin is terribly cold
Human Cast Members: We've heard the one about Alfred
Female Cast Member: It's strange!
Male Cast Member 1: Amazing!
Male Cast Member 2: And true!
Human Cast Members: But now that we've heard about Alfred
We'd like to hear more about you
Suzie: I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
Suzie: I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
Suzie: A tiny little story is all I need
To make a big mess
(Suzie laughs evilly)
Suzie: It starts as a story
Maybe it's true, maybe not
But once you repeat it
It's hard to defeat it
Now look at the mess that you've got
Now Alfred's a robot, everyone knows
The story is all over town
Us rumor weeds know how a rumor can grow
Just like a big weed in the ground
I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
Suzie: I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
Suzie: A tiny little story is all I need
To make a big mess
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
(Suzie laughs evilly)
Suzie: Don't start a rumor
No, no
Don't start a rumor. Ha!
Words can hurt, they spread like a tumor
So play it safe and don't start a rumor
I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
Suzie: Yes, I'm a rumor weed
Human Cast Members: She's a rumor weed
A tiny little story is all I need
To make a big mess
A tiny little story is all I need
Human Cast Members: You better watch out for the rumor weed!
(Applause is heard)
Suzie: Great job, guys!
(Everyone heads off stage as Larry enters)
Larry: Well that looked like fun!
Suzie: It sure was! Who knew lesson songs could be so much fun? I think this sharing thing might not be such a bad idea after all!
Larry: Right. But I say it's time to get back on track with the silliness!
Suzie: Well I won't argue with you there! Number 3!
Chorus: Number 3!
(Endangered Love starts playing and Suzie then leaves. During the song we see two people on stage dressed up as Barbara and Bill dancing and playing out the parts)
Announcer: And now it's time for Silly Songs with Larry, the part of the show where Larry comes out and sings a silly song. We join Larry as he follows the tragic saga of Barbara Manatee in the day time drama, Endangered Love.
Larry: Barbara Manatee.
Backup Singers: Manatee, manatee.
Larry: You are the one for me.
Backup Singers: One for me, one for me.
Larry: Sent from up above.
Backup Singers: Up above, up above.
Larry: You are the one I love.
Backup Singers: Barbara, oh Barbara.
Bill: Please don't cry Barbara.
You're a nice manatee.
You've been so good to me.
But I must go into the world and do noble things for the good of all.
And you can't come because you don't speak French. Au revoir!
Barbara: But if you leave, Bill.
Who will take me to the ball?
Who's going to take me to the ball, Bill?
I have a new dress and shoes,
and new manatee lipstick!
Who will take me to the ball?
Larry: I'll take you to the ball, Barbara Manatee!
Barbara: Please don't go.
Bill: I must.
Barbara: Don't go.
Bill: I must.
Barbara: Don't!
Bill: Must!
Barbara: Don't, don't!
Bill: Must, must!
Larry: Barbara Manatee.
Backup Singers: Manatee, manatee.
Larry: You are the one for me.
Backup Singers: One for me, one for me.
Larry: Sent from up above.
Backup Singers: Manatee from heaven.
Larry: You are the one I love.
Barbara Manatee.
Backup Singers: Manatee, manatee.
Larry: I'll be your mon ami.
Backup Singers: Mon ami, mon ami.
Larry: I'll take you to the ball.
Backup Singers: To the ball, to the ball.
Larry: I hope you're not too tall.
Backup Singers: You might have trouble dancing.
Barbara: Bill, I've learned French.
Bill: You have?
Barbara: Mais oui, je sui manatee. See?
Bill: Oui, oui, mon ami.
I always knew you could.
I really hoped you would.
Now can we go into the world and do noble things for the good of all?
Barbara: Yes. But first, Bill.
Will you take me to the ball? Oh, Bill.
Will you take me to the ball?
Bill: I can't dance.
Barbara: You can't?
Bill: No.
Barbara: I must go!
Bill: Please don't go.
Barbara: I must.
Bill: Don't go.
Barbara: I must.
Bill: Don't!
Barbara: Must!
Bill: Don't, don't!
Barbara: Must, must!
Larry: Barbara Manatee.
Backup Singers: Manatee, manatee.
Larry: You are the one--
Bob: Larry, what are you doing?
Larry: Just watching a little TV, Bob.
Bob: Well, maybe you should read a book.
Larry: Yeah. Okay.
Announcer: This has been Silly Songs with Larry. Tune in next time to hear Bill say:
Bill: Barbara! I've learned to dance!
Barbara: Oh, Bill.
(Bob comes out and the two performers leave)
Bob: Great job, everyone!
Suzie: That was extraordinary! I feel wonderful!
Bob: So I hear you have been getting this sharing thing down.
Suzie: Yep. And I think our audience is enjoying themselves too. Am I right?
(Cheers are heard)
Suzie: Aw great!
Bob: But I think it's time to get on with your show.
Suzie: Our show.
Bob: Our show. It's Silly Song Number 2.
Chorus: Number 2!
Suzie: Featuring the singing sensation, Boyz in the Sink!
(Belly Button starts playing. Two crew members get the mics for the Boyz ready and then. The Boyz in the Sink enter)
Mr. Lunt: (singing) Baby, I know your eyes see right through my disguise.
Boyz: And no one can deny.
Mr. Lunt: Baby, that I'm the one whose love is no surprise.
Boyz: And he can't tell you no lie.
Mr. Lunt: But there's a secret I've been hidin', I can't keep it no more.
Boyz: There's this thing about himself he's never told you before!
Mr. Lunt: Baby!
Boyz: He needs to tell you something!
Mr. Lunt: I don't got a belly button!
Boyz: No belly button!
Mr. Lunt: Oh, I need to tell you something!
Boyz: Have you figured out he don't got a belly button?
Mr. Lunt & Boyz: Belly button, no! Oh, no no!
Mr. Lunt: Baby, please don't squeal. Just tell me how you feel.
Boyz: Cause his love is for real.
Mr. Lunt: And if you went away, my heart would never heal.
Boyz: So, to you, he appeals.
Mr. Lunt: There's something missing in my middle, and it's hard to ignore.
Boyz: There's this thing about himself he's never told you before!
Mr. Lunt: Baby!
Boyz: He needs to tell you something!
Mr. Lunt: I don't got a belly button!
Boyz: No belly button!
Mr. Lunt: Oh, I need to tell you something!
Boyz: Have you figured out he don't got a belly button?
Mr. Lunt and Boyz: Belly button, no! Oh, no no!
(Suzie enters wearing a hat with a microphone in her hand)
Suzie: Bellybutton?
Boyz: Uh-uh.
Suzie: Bellybutton?
Boyz: Uh-uh!
Suzie: You say your bellybutton's missing? There's no reason for alarm.
It's a common thing for gourds. It won't do you any harm!
You're technically a fruit. And with that much being said,
your umbilical equivocal is up there on your head!
You could opt for a prosthetic but i think you need to know.
It'd be covered by your shirt! But not your HMO!
Belly button!
Belly button.
Uh what?
Mr. Lunt: A stylish something absent from my midriff's décor.
Boyz: There's this thing about himself he's never told you before!
Mr. Lunt: Baby!
Boyz: He needs to tell you something!
Mr. Lunt: (Inhale) I don't got a belly button!
Boyz: No belly button!
Mr. Lunt: Oh, I need to tell you something!
Boyz: Have you figured out he don't got a belly button?
Mr. Lunt and the Boyz: Belly button, no! Oh, no no!
No bellybutton!
(Cheers and applause are heard. Jimmy and Mr. Lunt leave)
Suzie: So good!
Junior: Suzie Suzie! Quick you gotta stall!
Suzie: Wait what?
Junior: We're starting a high energy aerobic portion of the show but i have a costume change and-
Suzie: Wait high energy aerobic portion of the show? But that's a silly song and it doesn't teach a lesson. It's not from the 80s or about food.
Larry: Actually, it's all of the above. Well not much about food unless your talking about burning it off. But it's pretty silly and it teaches good health. And defintely contains a hit from the 80s!
Suzie: But Larry, I think we need to finish the countdown and I-
(Larry looks down)
Suzie: Aww. Okay guys. (Larry smiles) You go get ready for the high energy aerobic portion of the show and I'll stall
(Footloose begins)
Suzie: Oh maybe not! (She begins to head off as Bob enters) Hey Bob!
(Bob dances and Larry, Junior, Jimmy and some backup dancers enter)
Bob: Been working so hard
I'm punching my card
Eight hours, for what?
Oh, tell me what I got
I've got this feeling
That time's just holding me down
Bob: You know what I mean, Larry?
Larry: Yeah!
Bob: Like a big clock on your head?
Larry: Yeah!
Bob: Yeah me too
I'll hit the ceiling
Or else I'll tear up this town
Bob, Larry, Junior and Jimmy: So now I gotta cut loose
Footloose
Kick off the Sunday shoes
Please, Louise
Pull me off of my knees
Jack, get back
Come on before we crack
Lose your blues
Everybody cut footloose
Larry: You're playing so cool (Bob: Uh huh)
Obeying every rule
Deep way down in your heart
You're burning, yearning for some
Somebody to tell you (Bob: Yeah tell me what?)
That life ain't passing you by
Bob: That's exactly how I feel! Sing it, Larry!
Larry: I'm trying to tell you
It will if you don't even try (Bob: Try? Try?!)
You can fly if you'd only
Bob, Larry, Junior and Jimmy: Cut loose
Footloose
Kick off the Sunday shoes
Ooh-wee, Marie
Call the ride with me
Woah, Milo
Come on, come on let's go
Lose your blues
Everybody cut footloose
Ooh-oh-oh (Larry: Cut footloose)
Ooh-oh-oh (Larry: Cut footloose)
Ooh-oh-oh (Larry: Cut footloose)
Ooh
Junior and Jimmy: (First)
Larry: You've got to turn me around
Junior and Jimmy: (Second)
Bob: And put your feet on the ground
Jimmy and Junior: (Third)
Junior: Now take the hold of all
(Four)
Larry: I'm turning it
Bob, Larry, Junior and Jimmy: loose
Footloose
Kick off the Sunday shoes
Please, Louise
Pull me off of my knees
Jack, get back
Come on before we crack
Lose your blues
Everybody cut footloose (Jimmy: Footloose)
Footloose (Jimmy: Footloose)
Kick off the Sunday shoes (Jimmy: C'mon C'mon C'mon girl)
Please, Louise
Pull me off of my knees
Jack, get back
Come on before we crack
Lose your blues
Bob: Everybody cut, everybody cut
Larry: Everybody cut, everybody cut
Jimmy: Everybody cut, everybody cut
Bob, Larry, Junior and Jimmy: (Everybody)
Everybody cut footloose!
(applause and cheers are head and the backup dancers, Junior and Jimmy leave)
Bob: Wow! That looked like quite a workout!
Suzie: Woo! (Takes off her sunglasses) It sure was! And I've learned something else too.
Bob: About exercising?
Suzie: Nah. I've learned that sharing is important. And that by sharing, it can lead to a really quite amazing show!
Bob: That's right. The Bible tells us to share, to be kind. God loves it when we share our toys or let other have their turn in. And you know what, Suzie?
Suzie: What's that, Bob?
Bob: I think it's our turn to share with you.
Suzie: Me?
Bob: Yep. This is the Silly Song Countdown after all.
Larry: And what's a countdown with a Number 1?
Chorus: Number.... 1!!!!!!!
Larry: Seriously, stop it now.
(Larry heads off to get ready)
Suzie: The number one song! I almost forgot! Okay everybody in your places! Costumes, check! Sound, check! Lights, check!
Bob: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, the number one silly song!
(Bob heads off as the Boyz in the Sink version of The Hairbrush Song begins)
Suzie: Ladies and gentlemen, Boys and girls, rutabegas and green beans of all ages, the moment you've all been waiting for! The number one silly song: The Hairbrush Song!
(Suzie heads off as Larry enters now wearing a towel)
(*sung in Japanese)
Larry: Oh, wheeee-ere is my hair-brush?
Oh, wheeee-ere is my hair-brush?
Oh where, oh where, Oh where, oh where Oh where, oh where, Oh where, oh where, oh wheeee-ere...is my hair-brush?
(Jimmy enters)
Jimmy: I think I saw a hairbrush back there!
Larry: Back theeee-ere (Junior and Jimmy: back there) is my hair-brush. (Junior and Jimmy: back there)
Back there (Junior and Jimmy: back there) is my hair-brush. (Junior and Jimmy: back there)
Back there, back there, Oh where, back there, Oh where, oh where, Back there, back there, Back theeee-ere...is my hair-brush
(Junior enters)
Junior: Hey Larry, I've been meaning to ask you something. Well, I was wondering, why do you need a hairbrush since well you don't have any hair
Larry: No hair (Junior and Jimmy: No hair) for my hairbrush. (Junior and Jimmy: No hair back there)
No hair (Junior and Jimmy: No hair) for my hairbrush. (Junior and Jimmy: No hair back there)
No hair, no hair, no where, no hair, no hair, no hair, no where, back there, no hair... (Jimmy: No hair back there!) for my hairbrush!
Junior: You know that's an old hairbrush and you never use it. Well, im sorry but I gave it to Apollo Gourd.
Larry: No!
Junior: He's teaching me to Sumo Wrestle and well he's got hair.
Larry: Not fair (Jimmy and Junior: Not Fair!) for my hairbrush. (Jimmy and Junior: He's got no hair)
Not fair! (Jimmy and Junior: Not Fair!) My poor hairbrush.(Jimmy and Junior: He's got no hair)
Not fair, not fair, no hair, not fair, no where, back there, not fair, not fair, not fair! (Jimmy: No fair no hair!) My little hairbrush!
Jimmy: Oh. Sorry
Larry: <Take Care>!* (Jimmy and Junior: Take Care) <of my hairbrush!> (Jimmy and Junior: of his hairbrush!)
<Take care!> (Jimmy and Junior: Take Care!) <oh my hairbrush!> (Jimmy and Junior: of his hairbrush)
<Take care, take care, don't dare not care, take care, nice hair, no fair, take care, take care ...> (Jimmy and Junior: Oh please take care!) <of my hairbrush!>
(Larry, Junior and Jimmy do a bow as cheers and applause are heard. All 3 head off and then the What Have We Learned song begins)
Singers: And so what we have learned applies to our lives today,
and God has a lot to say in His book.
(silence)
Singers: You see, we know that God’s word is for everyone,
and now that our song is done, we'll take a look.
(Bob enters as the song ends)
Bob: Today we learned that God wants us to share. Instead of being selfish and trying to get our way all the time
(Suzie enters)
Suzie: And we also learned that God wants us to be true friends. United and there for one another in times of need.
Larry: We also learned that if Bob's not out getting ice cream, he's probably out getting cake.
Suzie/Bob: Yeah/Right.
Bob: Well remember, it's great to share and to have such wonderful friends.
(The Boyz in the Sink version of I Can Be Your Friend starts as Suzie leaves. Junior, Jimmy and Mr. Lunt enter the stage)
Junior: Have you ever seen a boy with funny clothes;
A girl with braces on her teeth or freckles on her nose?
Larry: Some kids call them "oddballs" and some kids call them "weird."
Is it my imagination or does Aunt Ruth have a beard?
Mr. Lunt: God makes lots of people in all colors, shapes and sizes.
He loves them very much and what we need to realize is —
Jimmy: That calling people names because they're different is wrong.
Instead, we need to look on them in love and sing this song:
Larry and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Junior and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: Any day, in any weather,
We can be friends and play together!
Mr. Lunt and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Jimmy and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: It's okay if we are different,
We can still play 'cause I can be your friend!
Your friend!
Jimmy: Yeah, we're all pretty different; some are skinny, some are stout. (I'll be your friend)
But the inside is the part that we're supposed to care about. (I'll be your friend)
Larry: That's where we have feelings that are very much the same. (I'll be your friend)
So instead of "weirdo," I think "friend's" a better name! (I'll be your friend)
Larry and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Junior and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: If your hair is red or yellow, we can have lunch, I'll share my Jell-O!
Larry and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Jimmy and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: It's okay if we are different,
We can still play 'cause I can be your friend!
Mr. Lunt: It don't matter if we're not the same! (Your friend)
We're all different and that's a good thing! (Your friend)
Yes, God loves us! He knows us by name! (Your friend)
'Cuz we're all special, so stand up and sing...!
Larry and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Junior and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: Any day in any weather, we can be friends and play together!
Mr. Lunt and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
Jimmy and children's chorus: I can be your friend! (La, la, la)
All: It's okay if we are different,
We can still play 'cause I can be your friend!
I'll be your friend!
(Applause and cheer are heard)
Bob Goodbye!
Larry: Yeah! Thanks for coming! And remember, God made you special...
Everyone: ...And he loves you very much!
(Everyone leaves the stage)
Suzie: Did you guys have a great time?
(Audience cheers)
Suzie: Alright. Well I think if we scream really loudly one last time, we can convince the Veggies to do one more number. On 3. Ready? One two three!
(The audience screams as loud as they can)
Suzie: Alright! You guys got it! Make sure you sing along
(The live version of the VeggieTales theme song begins)
Suzie: If you like to talk to tomatoes,
(Larry comes out wearing a bow tie)
Larry: If a squash can make you smile,
(Bob comes out wearing a top hat)
Bob: If you like to waltz with potatoes
Larry: Up and down the produce aisle...
Bob, Larry and Suzie: Have we got a show for you!
(Suzie leaves and the veggies come out wearing bow ties)
All: VeggieTales, VeggieTales, VeggieTales, VeggieTales,
VeggieTales, VeggieTales, VeggieTales, VeggieTales!
Broccoli, celery, gotta be...
VeggieTales!
Lima beans, collard greens, peachy keen...
VeggieTales!
Cauliflower, sweet and sour, one full hour...
VeggieTales!
There's never, ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like VeggieTales!
There's never, ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like VeggieTales!
It’s time for VeggieTales!
Broccoli! (Broccoli!)
Celery! (Celery!)
Got to be... (Gotta be... )
VeggieTales! (VeggieTales!)
Junior (scatting): Brocco-rocco-rocco-roccoli!
Cele-le-le-le-lery!
Got to, got to, got to be...
VeggieTales!
All: There’s never, ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like VeggieTales!
There’s never, ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like VeggieTales!
It’s time for Veggie – time for Veggie – time for VeggieTales!
(pause as applause is heard)
All: There’s never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like VeggieTales!
(The song ends)
Suzie: Goodbye everyone! Thanks for coming! Bye! Buh-bye! Thanks for coming!
(Credits roll)
(End of transcript)