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TheGoodTheBadAndTheEgglyTitleCard

This is the transcript for The Good, the Bad, and the Eggly.

Transcript

Narrator: It's a Bumbly night in Peacefulburg. I mean, it's a peaceful night in Bumblyburg. The city's resident hero is on patrol. Ever vigilant, ever watchful, ever, LarryBoy!

(The Larry-Plane soars above the city.)

LarryBoy: Hey! Archie! Lights are still on at The Daily Bumble. (He turns the LarryPlane upside down and approaches the Daily Bumble.) Oh. It's just Bob putting the paper to bed. And there's Vicki. [Sighs.] Only the cutest cuke in town!

Archie: Y'know, I think Vicki just might go to the Founder's Day dance with you this year. If you get up the nerve to ask her.

(The LarryPlane leaves the Daily Bumble.)

LarryBoy: Oh yeah, like that will happen, Arch. When pigs fly. [Three pigs fly next to LarryBoy. They shoot bacon at him.] Oh no! I've been baconed!

Archie: Hang on LarryBoy, hang on!

Narrator: Pigs on the wing? What's going on here? Could this be a nefairious plot spawn by the diabolical team of LarryBoy's arch enemies? Greta Von Gruesome, Awful Alvin, and Lampy?

Awful Alvin: Ho Ho! My awful plan of villainous villainy is working to perfection!

Greta: Your plan?!? You mean my plan to distract LarryBoy when we break into the Bumblyburg Science Lab!

Awful Alvin: I believe that now is the time when we shall perform the Villainous Dance of Villainy! Dance with me, Lampy!

(He dances with Lampy)

Greta: I gave up telemarketing for this?

(Cut back to the flying pigs chasing LarryBoy. The lead pig clogs the engine.)

LarryBoy: Archie! The bacon grease is clogging the engine!

Archie: Eject, LarryBoy! You must eject!

LarryBoy: The ejector button is stuck!

Narrator: Things sure look bad for LarryBoy, but wait! Who is this cute little guy... (Dark Crow gives the camera a flat look.) Ah-oh, uh-uh, I mean, who is this, uh, handsome, oh-so-dashing superhero?

Dark Crow: I am... (guitar notes) The Dark Crow!

(Cut back to the falling LarryPlane. LarryBoy opens the windshield.)

Archie: Don't even think it, LarryBoy. Remember, you bruise easily.

LarryBoy: I am that hero! (He shoots his plungers on two trees to stop the LarryPlane from falling.) Wow. (The strings break off and he crashes.)

Archie: LarryBoy, look out! The pigs are coming in for another attack!

(The flying pigs lower towards LarryBoy, but Dark Crow grabs a vine and swings towards them.)

Dark Crow: CAW-CAW!

(He frightens the flying pigs and they fly off. Dark Crow uses his cape to glide down to safety.)

Narrator: What amazing daring-do from the Dark Crow, handsome superhero grape from Bumblyburg's neighboring town of Lollyhaven.

(Dark Crow lands near LarryBoy who is digging through his cockpit seat.)

Dark Crow: Ah, LarryBoy. (A cat screeches offscreen.) Go home, get some rest, because this case - I have to tell you something - is not big enough for the two of us.

(He then sees the flying pigs heading towards him. LarryBoy tries to oil the eject button as Dark Crow tries to get away from the flying pigs.)

LarryBoy: A little canola oil and... Yep. Good as new. (He accidently presses the ejector button.) Oops. (Gets ejected) AAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

(The lead pig attempts to lock in on Dark Crow, but LarryBoy crashes into him, causing the lead pig to crash into both the other pigs, causing both of them to fall in the pond. Luckily, Dark Crow provides them with life rings. Cut to LarryBoy as he parachutes into the trees.)

LarryBoy: Good thing I ejected into those pigs. Otherwise you might've had a cow full of bacon, huh, Dark Crow?

Dark Crow: (scoffs) Are you kidding me? They never would've stood a chance against... (guitar notes) The Dark Crow!

LarryBoy: Wow. His own theme music.

Archie: (In LarryBoy's earphone) LarryBoy, there's been a break-in at the Bumblyburg Science Labs! You better check it out!

LarryBoy: A break-in at the Bumblyburg Science Labs!

Dark Crow: It must be Awful Alvin and his team of fiends. (gasps in realization) Those flying pigs were simply a big fat distraction to keep us muy occupado!

LarryBoy: Right. Let's go get 'em.

Dark Crow: Let us go get them? The Dark Crow needs help from no vegetable.

(The Dark Crow grabs a tree branch and swings away.)

LarryBoy: Uh, DC? Can I catch a ride? My LarryPlane's gonna be in the shop a while.

(Cut to the Bumblyburg Science Labs. The villains have the scientists tied up and are standing next to a telescope.)

Greta: How is this telescope going to help us crack open the mega vault?

(Awful Alvin drags Lampy inside the labs with a wagon while Greta pushes the telescope inside.)

Awful Alvin: Lampy isn't just here for his pretty face and smooth dance steps. He also has his own super powers! (The telescope is aimed at the door of the mega vault.) I call this one the Lampy Laser! (Plugs in Lampy whose beam shoots out of the telescope and towards the door.) Go, Lampy! Go, Lampy!

(Outside, Dark Crow uses the crowbar to open the roof window of the lab and enters, catching the villains' attention.)

Greta: Dark Crow!

Dark Crow: I can't fool you, can I? (Dark Crow uses one of his yo-yos to unplug Lampy. Greta shoots a beam at him, but he dodges it and manages to tie up the two villains. Dark Crow lands in front of them confidently. He then hears a squeak and sees LarryBoy enter the labs on a unicycle.) LarryBoy! Stay out of this! I have things all wrapped up here.

(LarryBoy then turns to look at Lampy's cord and picks it up.)

LarryBoy: Not entirely. This loose cord is a safety hazard. A good superhero always takes time to prevent accidents.

Dark Crow: NOOO!

(Too late. LarryBoy plugs in Lampy, who sends a beam of light that sends the Dark Crow bouncing and crashing into LarryBoy. They end up falling into a pot of scientific goo.)

Greta: Thanks, LarryBoy. (She and Awful Alvin break free.) We couldn't have escaped without you.

LarryBoy: You're welcome. (Dark Crow glares at LarryBoy.) Oh, wait, you're not welcome.

(The two villains then use Lampy's ray to open the bin and take out a giant egg-shaped ray.)

Awful Alvin: Now that we have control of this, we'll be unstoppable! Ho-ho-ho! Ooh, ooh, I can feel another villainy dance coming on!

Greta: (grabs Awful Alvin) Oh, give it a rest!

(The two villains then leave with the ray.)

Narrator: Later, after pulling themselves from the sticky scientific goo, LarryBoy and Dark Crow free the scientists.

LarryBoy: I've got sticky scientific goo in my underpants.

Dark Crow: Professor, what is that device they stole?

Professor Flurbelflub: Oh, yes, it's an over-easy egg ray. It turns any inanimate object into over-easy eggs.

LarryBoy: They couldn't turn a cow into over-easy eggs, could they?

Professor Flurbelflub: No.

LarryBoy: Because cows are alive.

Professor Flurbelflub: Ja, Ja.

LarryBoy: What about a wooden cow?

Dark Crow: (Comes close to losing it, then sighs) Alright, the ray could work on a wooden cow. Oh!

LarryBoy: Because wooden cows aren't alive, are they?

(Beat)

Dark Crow: So, what you are saying, Professor, is that they will be able to turn almost anything into big, over-easy eggs?

LarryBoy: But not cows!

Professor Flurbelflub and Dark Crow: NO! NOT COWS!

(Professor Flurbelblub and Dark Crow walk off. LarryBoy then gives the viewers a stern look on his face as the screen fades to black. We then fade into the next night at the Bumblyburg Community College and we fade to the classroom where the class has a new superhero, Pumpkin.)

Narrator: The next night at Superhero Class, LarryBoy and Dark Crow tried to sit as far apart as possible.

Bok Choy: Superheroes, there are times when you have to work as a team. Together, you can accomplish many things you cannot do alone.

(As Bok Choy is talking, Dark Crow wrote something on a piece of paper and shows it to LarryBoy. On the paper, there is a picture of LarryBoy and there are flying bugs around him and it says "LarryBoy = Stinkiness".)

LarryBoy: "LarryBoy equals... stinkiness"? (He crumbles the paper up.)

Bok Choy: Take for instance, one of Bumpkin's vines. Good for snaring a villain, or tripping up an evildoer. But if I stack these heavy books on one vine, it cannot hold them. (While Bok Choy is talking, LarryBoy whistles and aims one of his plunger ears at Dark Crow. Dark Crow laughs, but the plunger ear shoots smoke at him.) But together, these vines are strong enough to hold the books.

LarryBoy: Master, um, what if a town that's under your sworn protection is invaded by an overgrown seedless grape?

Dark Crow: Who are you calling seedless?

Bok Choy: You both need to hear the words of my lesson. Heroes, turn your Superhero Handbooks to section 21, paragraph 4, subsections 9 and 10. "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion." (As Bok Choy is talking, Dark Crow extends his claw arm around the desks, grabs LarryBoy's underwear, lifts him up by it, and drops him, much to his anger.) When two work together, they are stronger than one.

(Fade to the Bumblyburg museum the next day.)

Narrator: The next day, the staff of the Daily Bumble newspaper visits a new exhibit at the Bumblyburg Museum of History and Really Old Stuff.

(Fade to inside the museum. The Daily Bumble staff walk around the new exhibit with Vicki taking pictures.)

Junior: Wow, this new exhibition of the ancient pharaohs is great!

Vicki: I'm getting so many good photos! (Takes photos of a painting of a sphinx, a sign that says "Having a Pharaoh-ly Good Time? There's More!" and Egyptian jewelry.)

Junior: Here, take this shot. (Junior is shown standing next to a sarcophagus.) My headline can be "Me and My Mummy"! (Vicki does so.)

Bob: That's fine for the school newspaper, Junior, but it's not the kind of story that sells in Bumblyburg. I wish something exciting would happen around here.

(Bob's wish is about to come true, as outside the museum, the villains are preparing to break in.)

Greta: Concrete walls cannot keep us out, now that we have the power of the Over-Easy Egg Ray! Prepare to fire!

(Awful Alvin pulls the lever, causing the ray to fire at a wall, surprising the Daily Bumble staff.)

Vicki: (gasps) The wall... It's turning into... over-easy eggs!

(The staff gets out of the way as the section turns into eggs and lands on the ground. The citizens evacuate the exhibit as the villains enter.)

Greta: The forbidden treasures of the Bumblyburg Museum of History and Really Old Stuff are now ripe for the taking!

(Awful Alvin then grabs the rope used to surround the pyramid exhibit and ties up the Daily Bumble staff with it a la Rack, Shack, & Benny)

Vicki: You'll never get away with this! LarryBoy will stop you!

(Awful Alvin then puts on an Egyptian hat and gives one to Lampy.)

Awful Alvin: Oh Lampy, doesn't this villainy just make you feel like dancing?

Greta: One more dance step, and I'll serve you on toast with a side of bacon.

(Meanwhile, the Daily Bumble staff tries to break out of the ropes to no avail.)

Bob: Now this is what I call news.

Vicki: (struggles to get free) If I could get free, I could snap a front-page photo of the villains.

(Meanwhile, Greta approaches a sarcophagus.)

Greta: I wonder what's in here. I hope it's filled with diamonds, or rubies, or a fondue set! I love fondue.

(She then breaks open the sarcophagus to find...)

Dark Crow: CAW-CAW! (Dark Crow leaps out of the sarcophagus and he and Greta face each other.) Prepare to eat crowbar! (Dark Crow leaps at Greta.) En garde! (He and Greta battle it out. LarryBoy then enters the museum in the LarryMobile.) Stay out of my way, LarryBoy! I told you, this is my case!

LarryBoy: I don't have to- (gasps) LOOK OUT!

(Greta whacks Dark Crow, making him knock into a pillar that is about to fall on the Daily Bumble staff.)

Vicki: LarryBoy! HELP!!!!!!

(LarryBoy sees the staff and pulls them to safety with his plunger ear. Bob and Junior get up.)

Bob: Let's get outta here!

Junior: Oh, we're gone!

(They speed out of the museum.)

LarryBoy: Vicki, I want to ask you something about the Founder's Day dance.

Vicki: Yes, LarryBoy? What is it?

LarryBoy: Um, this year...Are they gonna have refreshments? You know, like hot fudge sundaes at the dance?

(Dark Crow hops up to them.)

Dark Crow: Did you say "dance"? I was born to dance.

(Dances for the two of them. LarryBoy glares at this.)

LarryBoy: Hey! You mind?

Awful Alvin: Yoo hoo! I thought you might to know that you're about to become victims of a concentrated blast of pure villainy!

Dark Crow: Your over-easy egg ray cannot hurt us! (laughs)

LarryBoy: We're not wooden cows!

(Dark Crow glares at LarryBoy for his joke and Awful Alvin is unamused.)

Awful Alvin: (unamused) Right. But it will work quite nicely on your super costumes!

Greta: Better kiss your super costumes good-bye!

(Greta and Alvin laugh as Alvin pulls the lever on the Over-Easy Egg Ray.)

LarryBoy: Ha! Sheesh! That's a good one!

(The egg ray turns their super-suits into over-easy eggs, to their horror.)

Dark Crow: The Dark Crow, will stop you, costume or not.

(He hops up to them, but Greta shoots a blast at him, making him crash into LarryBoy.)

Awful Alvin: You two super-losers let us go about our villainous villainy, (grabs Vicky before she could grab her camera) or the newspaper gal gets egged!

Vicki: LarryBoy! HELP!!!!!!

(The villains leave the scene of the crime as we fade to black. We fade to LarryBoy and Dark Crow with makeshift costumes. Dark Crow's costume consists of a paper bag and a pink sock. LarryBoy's costume consists of pajamas, a paper bag and a single plunger.)

Narrator: With the egg timer running out on Vicki and almost the safety of all Bumblyburg, LarryBoy and Dark Crow wipe the egg off their faces and get back to work.

Dark Crow: These costumes won't exactly strike fear into the hearts of evil doers.

LarryBoy: Greta and Awful Alvin have Vicki! We don't have time to be concerned about fashion!

Narrator: Our heroes return to the lab to seek help from Professor Flurbelflub. (As LarryBoy and Dark Crow head inside, the professors laugh at their new attire. One of them falls on the ground laughing. LarryBoy and Dark Crow look at each other.) After they stop laughing at their new costumes.

(We fade to the heroes and scientists as Professor Flurbelflub tells them their plan to stop the villains.)

Professor Flurbelflub: Vell, we may have a way to help. Ze Over-Easy Egg Ray Gun is made from the only substance strong enough to resist ze ray's power.

Dark Crow: That is why the ray gun itself does not turn into over-easy eggs, yes?

Professor Flurbelflub: Ja. It's made from Egganium. Und we have use the same metal to create zis. (The professors introduce to our heroes a robot called...) The Bunny Bot 3000, the ultimate in over-easy egg ray fighting technology.

LarryBoy: But why is it shaped like a bunny?

Professor Flurbelflub: Vell, we think bunnies are real cute.

(The professors nod in agreement as LarryBoy and Dark Crow look at each other.)

Professor Flurbelflub: Zere's only one problem: We only had enough Egganium to make one Bunny Bot. You'll have to share.

Dark Crow: Share?! No hip-hopping-bunny-trailing way! This is my case!

LarryBoy: And it's my city!

(Dark Crow sighs in realization)

Dark Crow: You know, you're right. Your shoe's untied.

(LarryBoy looks down.)

LarryBoy: Hey, I'm not wearing any shoes. I don't even have feet!

Dark Crow: It is such a conundrum, no? (LarryBoy looks up to see that the Dark Crow has entered the cockpit of the Bunny-Bot) Adios, amigo! Vicki, do not fear! The Dark Crow is coming to save you!

(Dark Crow takes off in the Bunny-Bot, but LarryBoy manages to jump and catch onto it while screaming for dear life.)

Narrator: Meanwhile, the villains were floating around town turning things into eggs, just because they could, and just because they were bad.

(The villains turn various stuff in Bumblyburg into over-easy eggs and share an evil laugh while Vicky struggles to get free.)

Awful Alvin: I simply love being bad. It makes me shimmy all over. I shimmy with badness! (He and Greta hear something.) Look! Up in the sky!

Greta: It's a weather balloon!

Awful Alvin: It's a metallic flying fish!

LarryBoy: Whoooaaa!

(The Bunny-Bot lands in front of the villains.)

Greta: It's a cucumber wearing pajamas attached to a bunny-shaped robot?

Vicki: It's LarryBoy!

(LarryBoy hides behind the Bunny Bot 3000)

Dark Crow: Halt, villains! Your days of foul deeds are basically over.

Greta: Don't you mean "Over-Easy?"

(Greta shoots the Over-Easy Egg at the Bunny Bot 3000, but it has no luck)

Awful Alvin: What!? How could this be?

Dark Crow: Looks like you're heading to the hothouse, my friends, to do some hard-boiled timeout.

(Dark Crow activates the claws as Awful Alvin and Greta gulps.)

LarryBoy: It's my turn to use the Bunny Bot! You got to fly it here!

Dark Crow: Oh, please. (mocking LarryBoy) "You got to fly it here." That doesn't count!

(As LarryBoy and Dark Crow are fighting, Awful Alvin gets an idea.)

Awful Alvin: I've got an awful idea.

(Awful Alvin shoots the over easy egg at the bumble bee sign from the Daily Bumble and it turns to eggs and starts falling.)

LarryBoy: But it should be my turn because I-- (LarryBoy notices the over easy egg is falling and tries to move, but is too late. We fade to Awful Alvin and Greta inside the former's lair and we cut to LarryBoy who is feeling dizzy, Dark Crow and Vicki tied up behind the sarcophagus.)

Awful Alvin: Well, good morning, eggy-heads! Welcome to my secret lair!

LarryBoy: Don't worry, Vicki, I'll get us out of this.

Dark Crow: You?! Ha! I once again laugh in your vegetable face. Only a fruit like me can save us now!

Greta: I'm afraid no one can save you. For you see, with just a flip of ze switch, the Over-Easy Egg Ray turns right things into a big glop of eggs which will plop down into the skillet!

Awful Alvin: You're about to become the world's biggest Superhero and Vicki Omelet!

(LarryBoy, Dark Crow, and Vicki are shocked by this threat to their lives. Pan down to show butter melting in the skillet.)

Dark Crow: Okay, see how you mess up my plans? Make me wear paper bags over my head? My anger for you is raging largely as we speak, mi amigo!

LarryBoy: What about the way you try to take over my superhero territory and the girl I'm inviting to the Founder's Day dance?! (LarryBoy shuts his mouth, realizing what he said out loud)

Dark Crow: Vicki, tell him that the Dark Crow is your favorite.

Vicki: Both of you stop it! Look!

Greta: Say goodbye forever!

(Greta's about to pull the switch, but gets pulled a cape by Awful Alvin)

Awful Alvin: No! I, Awful Alvin, the most awful mind of our time should be allowed to finish them off.

Greta: Nein!!! I've vaited too long for zes moment to let a shmelly little onion flip the switch!!!

Awful Alvin: Such an awful deed as this should only be done by the most awful villain, and I could out-awful you with one root behind my back!

Dark Crow: You know, if they just quit arguing, they could've finish this up by now.

LarryBoy: Yeah. They would both get what they want if only they'd work together.

(A same thought cloud of Bok Choy appears since Leggo my Ego!)

Bok Choy: When two work together, they are stronger than one. (the thought cloud disappears)

LarryBoy: What are we doing?! We should have been working together!

Dark Crow: Side by side, me amigo.

Awful Alvin: Okay okay, then why don't we vote on who gets to throw the switch?

Greta: Fine, but Lampy's vote doesn't count!

Awful Alvin: Wha- Of course it counts! He's heating the skillet!

Vicki: Guys, I think if we can bump the telescope just right, we might have a chance.

LarryBoy: You know, you're pretty smart for someone who's never been to a superhero class.

(He and Dark Crow then begin to rock the sarcophagus back and forth until they hit the telescope, therefore redirecting Lampy's lasers and freeing both Vicky and the two heroes, unfortunately, the shattering was loud enough for Greta and Alvin to hear)

Greta: (pushes Awful Alvin out of the way) They're escaping!

(Greta fires the ray at the three escapees as they run and hide behind the Bunny-Bot.)

Dark Crow: It's your turn, LarryBoy. I did get to fly it here, after all.

(LarryBoy smiles confidently at this and jumps into the Bunny-Bot.)

LarryBoy: Give up, villains! (activates the egg beater on the Bunny-Bot to Greta's shock) Prepare to get beaten!

(He pilots the Bunny Bot and approaches the egg ray. Greta dashes out of the way as LarryBoy destroys the ray with the egg beater.)

Vicki: Yeah, LarryBoy!

Dark Crow: That's my avberndie!

(Unfortunately, Awful Alvin activates Lampy's laser. Vicki and Dark Crow duck as the laser slices off one of the Bunny-Bot's legs and it falls with LarryBoy inside it.)

Awful Alvin: (offscreen) Get him, Lampy!

(He activates Lampy's laser again)

LarryBoy: Shouldn't there be an eject button?

(Dark Crow turns and sees something.)

Dark Crow: Hang on, LarryBoy!

(Dark Crow then catapults the paper and it ties up Awful Alvin and Lampy and unplugs the latter.)

Awful Alvin: Lampy, what are you doing!? Let me go-oo-oo!

(Dark Crow hops over to LarryBoy)

Dark Crow: Just working with you, partner.

(Greta tries to get away.)

LarryBoy: Let's stop Greta together.

(Dark Crow aims LarryBoy's replacement plunger like a slingshot and fires it at the door.)

Greta: Sorry, boys. You missed!

(Greta laughs, but LarryBoy and Dark Crow pull the door open with the string and knock Greta into a pool.)

LarryBoy: Sorry, evildoers. This time, things didn't turn out sunny-side up for you!

(We fade to the Bumblyburg Jail Cell as Lampy, Greta, and Awful Alvin dress as prisoners and we fade back to the Bumblyburg Science Labs as LarryBoy and Dark Crow returned the Over-Easy Egg Ray got their original costumes back.)

Narrator: And so with the villainous threesome safely in jail, LarryBoy and Dark Crow returned the Over-Easy Egg Ray to the Bumblyburg Science Labs.

Dark Crow: We want you all to know we did this together as a team.

LarryBoy: Because when two people work together, they're more powerful than either one of them is alone.

Bob: Oh, I can see the headline, now! "Teamwork tosses bad guy salad"! Or..or..or "United we stand! Divided, we get egg on our faces"!

Vicki: Was there something you want to ask me about Founder's Day, LarryBoy?

LarryBoy: W-Well- Drawing blanks here.

Vicki: Didn't you want to ask me to the Founder's Day dance, LarryBoy?

LarryBoy: Oh, right.

Vicki: I love to go with you!

LarryBoy: Wow!

Vicki: Maybe we could go have a nice dinner together first.

Dark Crow: Wait for me, LarryBoy! We are some team, are we not? We must do everything together now. I will show you how to dance because I am, the Dark Crow. (they leave) I have a very talented choreographer you should meet. She does all my music. (iris out)

(end of transcript)

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