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TheAmazingCarnivalofComplainingTitleCard

This is a commentary on The Amazing Carnival of Complaining with the whole Penguins crew and Ron Smith.

Transcript

(commentary does not start until the theme song is finished)

Smith: Hi, this is Ron Smith. I'm the director of 3-2-1 Penguins!, and I'm here with the whole penguins crew.

Zidgel: Zidgel here; ship's captain.

Midgel: First officer, Midgel here. Ship's pilot and mechanic.

Fidgel: Fidgel here; ship's scientist.

Kevin: This is Kevin. But, I don't do anything.

Fidgel: Hey, who's that on the left?

Zidgel: Oh, a thumb game! I've graded that! Come on, Fidgel! Hrrrr!

Fidgel: Ahh!

Midgel: If we had rink-sized seats, too.

(after Jason turns his head the second time on the table)

Smith: We had to paint out the mark on his forehead after that one.

Zidgel: There we are, crammed in.

Fidgel: I feel they should talk to our agents about the working conditions there.

Zidgel: D'oh, the chicken attack still gives me nightmares! Brrr! And that sinister clucking! It's like I can still hear it!

(after Jason clucks)

Zidgel: Aah! There it is again!

(after Jason says "Help me out")

Midgel: They must have just eaten.

(Jason places the chicken on the ship)

Fidgel: Oh, that cozy smoke like Earl Grey.

Zidgel: You mean Earl back at the Academy? Yeah, I remember that guy. Pungeoned as I recall.

Midgel: He's the one who cleaned out the tea tanks.

Fidgel: Never mind.

Smith: Great ads on that other page.

Smith: Interesting fact, these are actually seedless grapes and Jason had to act like he just bit a seed.

Kevin: Good thing he didn't bite that apple. Look, it's, it's made of wood.

Midgel: Mmmm.

Fidgel: Oh.

Zidgel: Mmmm, yum.

Midgel: I haven't been to a good pumpkin popping since last autumn.

Midgel: We haven't met Trevor yet, have we?

Kevin: Rather enjoy that.

Fidgel: That's pronounced touche.

Kevin: Cute hat.

Zidgel: I say the boy's got an attitude problem.

Kevin: She sounded a little sloshy.

Midgel: Over a seed or star, That's the choice.

Zidgel: Oh, we should've had the shields up for that.

Kevin: Nice save.

Kevin: Who said that, you or the chicken?

Fidgel: What's that one.

Midgel: Microliptus bullamankus.

Fidgel: It's beautiful.

Midgel: Thank you.

Zidgel: (laughs)

Fidgel: Ow! Ow! Please stop doing that.

Kevin: Oh, cowboy buddy!

Kevin: I've got ten gallons of cottage cheese in that hat.

Kevin: What is a derby?

Zidgel: It's where they race hats.

Zidgel: Nice spin move, huh?

Zidgel: (chuckles) That was fun.

Fidgel: Yes, cleaning the laughter, it wasn't fun, though.

Kevin: Yeah.

Kevin: Mission accomplished.

Zidgel: Now that's acting.

Midgel: Swish.

Fidgel: Midgel, why are you speaking into an avocado?

Midgel: Uh, worked better than the banana.

Zidgel: Technically, mine is the only seat on the ship that goes around, you know.

Midgel: Wasted gas on that.

Fidgel: Three weeks of working with Debbie Allen and look what we got.

Midgel: Just a kick for a change would have done there.

Kevin: Don't really remember much for a while after that.

Fidgel: Grape growers.

Midgel: Remember this point we didn't have a plot?

Kevin: Look where we found it.

Midgel: Yeah, page nine.

Kevin: Would have been a short show.

Midgel: There it is.

Kevin: Should have used some tools.

Midgel: When are you going to clean off that cannon?

Fidgel: I was still flushed from performing my number.

Kevin: Right, left, right, left. Honk, honk, honk.

Midgel: You got it.

Fidgel: It's a good thing we missed those rings around R&R because they're actually make of melted salt water taffy. Very stainy. Horrible to clean up.

Midgel: Misjudged that bit.

Kevin: Better than missing it all together, I suppose.

Fidgel: That guy was weirder than a brand-o.

Zidgel: Weird isn't the word.

Fidgel: Oh, terrifying.

Midgel: I think that's pre-programmed music. He's not even hitting the keys.

Zidgel: Kinda looks like Zero Mostel.

Kevin: His breath.

Zidgel: What language was he speaking?

Zidgel: What is with the finger?

Midgel: Didn't seem as ominous then, though.

Zidgel: There's a good view.

Fidgel: Now, frankly, he did have an impressive vocabulary.

Smith: Cole de joie means cap of joy.

Midgel: Might as well get cap of scalp irritation. I was just in a complaining mood.

Midgel: I couldn't hear anytime, seriously.

Kevin: We had no idea.

Fidgel: Well, you see, I think the baking win should have brought all this with him.

Zidgel: I don't remember the shuttle ride at all.

Kevin: What's wrong with the w on that sign?

Kevin: How would you know?

Kevin: No smudges.

Midgel: I never did see any of the pumpkin parents. I guess they just dropped them off.

Zidgel: That's my favorite ride.

Kevin: If those kids were any littler, they'd be seeds.

Fidgel: That was fun.

Kevin: That was my favorite ride.

Midgel: Eighteen takes for that one.

Kevin: Well, that was my favorite ride, too.

Zidgel: (laughs) That's a great line.

Kevin: Now that was my favorite ride.

Smith: Very observant of you, Kevin.

Zidgel: This reminds me of when you and I took that road trip to Miami.

Midgel: I forgot about that.

Fidgel: I tried to forget for two years.

Kevin: Don't like that smile.

Zidgel: I'm pretty sure we were all equally dissatisfied at that point.

Zidgel: D'oh!

Kevin: That was a giveaway.

Midgel: Never really smelled like trash for a few hours after that?

Kevin: Not me.

Zidgel: Nice disguise there, Kevin.

Midgel: Thanks for clearing that up.

Kevin: Dispose of the evidence.

Zidgel: Remember meeting that guy at the Rat Party?

Midgel: Yeah, the model 5-J carnibot is a really nice bloke.

Fidgel: Simply charming.

Zidgel: He's a pretty good juggler, too.

Kevin: Did you get to meet his friend, the blue fellow?

Fidgel: Yes, he was very nice.

Kevin: With the large hammer.

Kevin: There he is.

Midgel: Yeah.

Kevin: Hello.

Fidgel: Midgel, I think you have digital self-resistance before the mechanics of all this.

Midgel: That was common system.

Kevin: Very graceful.

Zidgel: Like a ballet.

Fidgel: How did you get up there?

Kevin: I am Kevin. I've got a good diagonal, too.

Kevin: Tim, I think was his name.

Fidgel: You know, they caught one of his lies. He's actually a funny man.

Kevin: Yes.

Kevin: When we got there, he didn't have any cords as I didn't have any cords. Connected two of them.

Kevin: Must have been a raspberry seed.

Zidgel: I don't remember any of this. I think I was in my trailer.

Midgel: I was practicing the song.

Fidgel: That was actually pretty fun.

Fidgel: Well, except for that part.

Kevin: Right.

Kevin: That also means everyone leaves.

Midgel: He's got some far moves.

Midgel: Lame arcade, though.

Zidgel: Oh, that's President No-I'm-The-President.

Smith: He usually shows up for a day or so in the shoot.

Smith: We had to turn that planet so you can see the rings.

Midgel: That stunt double of Kevin looks kind of like him, don't it?

Zidgel: (laughs) Fire!

Kevin: Fire!

Fidgel: I can see you've done better.

Midgel: The rocket pack, it was fun between takes, wasn't it?

Kevin: Yeah.

Fidgel: I felt like James Bond.

Fidgel: Fire!

Fidgel: Hey!

Zidgel: I'm just glad I took some travelmene before I took a ride on that thing.

Fidgel: I told you I could do my own stunts.

Midgel: I thought you were enjoying that too much.

Fidgel: This penguin was made to fly.

Kevin: That was close.

Fidgel: The only one.

Midgel: You were guessing at that point, weren't you?

Fidgel: No, I was not.

Midgel: You were.

Fidgel: I was very careful at rehearsing.

Midgel: That was totally half-hazard.

Fidgel: That was acting.

Smith: For the first couple of takes, that thing just heaved.

Fidgel: That's my Clint Eastwood look.

Smith: We had to tail him off every take.

Fidgel: Oh!

Fidgel: Do you remember those canisters?

Midgel: That was a high-powered microphone.

Smith: It's a cartoon.

Smith: The planet was just a lot closer than you think.

Zidgel: This scene still brings a tear to my eye!

Kevin: Ow.

Zidgel: See, even in seed form, you can't deny the do.

Kevin: Nice catch.

Kevin: There's his trailer.

Zidgel: Yeah, that's the last time someone pulls that gag on me.

Midgel: They say you can tell a lot about a man by the car he drives.

Midgel: Resolution music.

Kevin: Remember all the graffiti on the back of that billboard?

Zidgel: That's why they gave me the big bucks.

Zidgel: Now I shouldn't have tried so hard to nail it down for him.

Midgel: Yeah.

Kevin: He's right!

Midgel: How does he get his eyebrows to do that?

Fidgel: It's an inborn talent.

Midgel: One tie in the other.

Kevin: Remember when Blue Man Group played those tunes?

Fidgel: That's actually a watermelon seed. The grape seed wouldn't show up on camera.

Fun Facts

  • The Earl Grey Fidgel spoke of was tea, blended with citrus flavor and aroma derived from the addition of oil extracted from the rind of the bergamot orange.
  • Debbie Allen is an American actress and director.
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