|Petunia's Not Funny|
March 25, 2016
Petunia's Not Funny is the second half of the twelfth episode of the third season of VeggieTales in the House.
At Bob and Larry's house, Bob, Larry, Mayor Archibald, Petunia, and Madame Blueberry are exchanging jokes, Larry being the first one as he tells a joke that ends with "So I says, I says, 'That was no Buffalorange, that was my wife'!", while balancing a tray with five glasses of water on his head while hula hooping which the others laugh about, while Mayor Archibald tells Larry that it's the funniest thing he's ever seen. Larry then says, "Five waters for five vegetables", asking what could possibly go wrong, before tripping after that, which Madame Blueberry thinks is too much and that Larry is a riot. Larry is able to catch four of the glasses of water he was balancing, the fifth one landing in his mouth as he drinks it all down, which the others cheer about. Bob then says that if they all thought was funny, to get a load of this joke, which goes, "Did you hear the one about the banana who kept leaving his laundry on the floor? He slipped on his own peel!, which the others laugh about while Mayor Archibald says, "More like a banana splat!", the others still laughing, before Mayor Archibald asks who else is funny.
Madame Blueberry says that she hasn't done it in years, but she used to be a mime on the streets in Paris, before she starts doing a mime act where she is acting like she is running into a wall, which the others also find very funny. Bob says that they are a funny bunch, before Petunia says to let her try, Larry telling her to go for it. Petunia starts telling a joke about a carrot, who is actually a baby carrot, but unfortunately, because she's trying to get into the details, the others don't find her joke very funny, even when she takes up so much time trying to tell it right. When Petunia finally finishes her joke, the others are forced to laugh along with her, while Archibald tells Madame Blueberry that that was the longest joke he ever heard, Madame Blueberry saying that she feels faint. Petunia then asks the others if they want her to tell another joke, but the others tell her no, before Bob says that they can do something else now, before asking Larry to help him with something in the kitchen. Larry doesn't quite get it until Bob does some subtle motions, which causes Larry to finally understand, before he and Bob go to the kitchen. After Bob and Larry have gotten into the kitchen, Larry tells Bob that Petunia's joke was horrible, but Bob tells him that he's going to hurt her feelings, though Larry says that it was so unfunny that he may never laugh again, though Bob tells him that it wasn't that bad. However, Bob is proven wrong when he sees Petunia attempting to tell a joke about a cup, asking why they call it a cup when it should be called a "water management device", Archibald saying that he gets it, then says that he doesn't get it at all.
After witnessing this, Bob realizes that it was that bad, before Larry says that they have to do something, telling Bob that he needs to tell Petunia that she's not funny. Bob tells Larry that they shouldn't hurt Petunia's feelings, certain that this will all blow over real fast. Petunia is still laughing, just as Bob and Larry come out of the kitchen, before Petunia decides that she's going to sell her flower delivery business and become a professional comedian. Madame Blueberry, Mayor Archibald, Bob, and Larry are subtly horrified to hear this, while Petunia thanks them for the inspiration then goes to leave. Larry once again tells Bob that they have to tell Petunia, then calls out to Petunia who stops. Bob is surprised, while Larry tells Bob that they have to tell Petunia, which Petunia is confused about, and when Larry is about to tell Petunia that she's not funny, Bob pulls Larry down, while Larry tries telling Petunia that she can't sell her shop because she's not funny, but Bob still tries to stop him. Petunia then leaves, while Bob is relieved that no one got their feelings hurt, just as Larry falls over from getting stopped by Bob. Meanwhile, Petunia is making a flower delivery to Corn Woman, who thanks Petunia for the flower, before Petunia asks Corn Woman if she's heard that she's selling her flower business and becoming a professional comedian, before adding that the flowers she has with her are her last deliveries. Corn Woman is in disbelief that Petunia is going to become a comedian, which Petunia confirms repeatedly, at the same time that Bob and Larry are watching everything. Larry tells Bob that they have to tell Petunia she's not funny before she sells her flower business, then wonders how. Bob then suggests that they tell her a bad joke so that she sees what it's like, which Larry agrees with.
Petunia comes up to Pa Grape's store with her flowers, when Bob and Larry come to her, Bob telling her that he has a joke for her. Petunia is excited when Bob says this, then says to hear it, as Bob starts off with a Knock Knock joke, Petunia saying that she loves Knock Knock jokes. Bob says that that's good, but Petunia ends up misunderstanding, thinking that it's "Oh, that's good who", which causes Bob to incredulously ask what just happened, which Petunia repeats, before laughing, thinking that that's a good one and that she'll have to remember it. After Petunia leaves, Bob seriously asks what just happened, while Larry quips that that backfired, before he likewise comes up with an idea, which is that they tell Petunia the funniest joke ever, which involves a tomato, an apple, and a cherry that all became matadors, which Bob says is the best joke ever. Larry agrees with that, then says that they tell Petunia that joke and that she'll see what a masterfully-told joke sounds like. Meanwhile, Petunia is making a series of funny faces for Captain Mike, who says that those were 100 funny faces, but is not sure that he wants to see the other 400. Larry then calls out for Petunia, just as Captain Mike goes back inside the house again, before Larry asks Petunia how she would like to hear the scientifically-proven funniest joke ever. Petunia is excited, saying that she sure would, before Larry tells the joke, starting out with a tomato, but Petunia cuts off Larry, saying "Gets embarrassed but no one can tell" then laughs. Larry tells Petunia that that's not it, before he finally gets to the part with the apple, but once again, Petunia cuts him off saying "And the apple wonders how the tomato fell so far from the tree?", then does a funny voice saying, "Hey! Hey, how'd you fall so far?! I can't fall that far from the tree!", before laughing once again. Larry tells Petunia to hold on, this time saying that there's a tomato, an apple, and a cherry, but then says that he forgot, though Petunia says, "And all three are like, 'I'm seeing double'!" then laughs once again.
Larry tells Petunia that that's not the joke, but Petunia thinks that that was the funniest joke of all time and thanks him for before saying that she's got her final deliveries to make before she sells the shop and "enter the glamorous world of comedy". Petunia then puts on a pair of sunglasses and leaves, while Larry says that it's harder than he thought and that he's all out of ideas, then asks how they'll tell Petunia she's not funny without hurting her feelings. Fortunately, Bob says that there's only one thing left to do, which Larry is surprised to hear, which Bob confirms, saying "The town meeting!" At Mayor Archibald's office, Mayor Archibald says that he hereby calls this town meeting to order, before Bob tells the crowd, consisting of Madame Blueberry, Corn Woman, Pa Grape, Ichabeezer, and Bacon Bill, that they called this town meeting because they have something very serious to talk about. Larry then says that they need to tell Petunia that she isn't funny, which Ichabeezer agrees with, before Bob adds that they don't want to hurt Petunia's feelings because Petunia is their friend and they all love her. Bob then says that how they do this is very important, while Larry tells the crowd that they might have some ideas. Corn Woman suggests that they buy Petunia a parrot and that it could squawk real loud when she talks so that no one can hear her, but Larry turns down that idea, claiming it to be "too feathery". Mayor Archibald then suggests that they write a note and put it in a fortune cookie so that Petunia can find it the next time she eats Chinese food, but Bob likewise turns down that idea, claiming it to be "too indirect". Ichabeezer then offers to use a bullhorn and use it to shout "Petunia's not funny!" over and over until his throat is dry, though Larry also turns down that idea, claiming it to be "too not indirect".
Bacon Bill then suggests that they do nothing because Petunia is hilarious, which causes everyone to look directly at Bacon Bill, though Bacon Bill says that he thinks Petunia's funny. Bob is frustrated that this is getting them nowhere, but fortunately for them, Pa reminds everyone that they don't need parrots or bullhorns or fortune cookies, but rather kindness, then says that Proverbs 15:4 says that kind words are a tree of life, but mean words can hurt someone. Because of that, Pa starts singing about showing kindness to your friends when being honest with them and to be careful with how you word your honest feelings with them. After the song ends, Bob realizes that Pa is right and that they should use kind words, and since they all love Petunia, they should all do it together. Meanwhile, Petunia enters her greenhouse, becoming surprised when she sees Bob, Larry, Madame Blueberry, Ichabeezer, Bacon Bill, Mayor Archibald, Pa, and Corn Woman in the greenhouse. Petunia asks them all what they're doing in her greenhouse, if they're making a salad, which she laughs about. This time, Bob tells Petunia that they all have something to tell her, Petunia thinking that it's at the same time and that it'll be hard to understand, laughing about it again. Bob tells Petunia that they all have the same thing to tell her, before telling Petunia that they're her friends and they love her no matter what, but they all need to tell her, she's not funny. After Bob says this, everyone prepares for Petunia's reaction, but much to their surprise, Petunia casually tells them that she knows. Petunia tells them that she knows that none of them like her jokes and that she doesn't mind and that she found them hilarious.
Everyone is relieved to hear this, though Ichabeezer is disappointed, before Mayor Archibald says that that's a relief, while Madame Blueberry adds that "you could cut the tension with a knife". Bacon Bill tells Petunia that he thinks she's funny, though Ichabeezer says that he came to see drama. Petunia then adds that she's fine with them not laughing at her jokes, before Bob asks her if she's still going to sell her flower shop and become a comedian, but Petunia tells him that she was just joking. Petunia then tells the others that they don't get her jokes, but that doesn't matter because they're her friends, then thanks for being so sensitive and sweet. Larry answers with "No problem", before Petunia tells Bob that that was so nice when he was like, "We're your friends and we love you no matter what", imitating Bob while saying so. Everyone is surprised when Petunia is able to perfectly mimic Bob, while Madame Blueberry asks Petunia how she did that. Larry asks Petunia if she swallowed Bob, but Bob tells him that he's right here, then asks Petunia if she can do that again. This time, Petunia then mimics Larry, saying, "It's me! Larry the Cucumber! I'm silly and lovable all at the same time!", which this time, everyone laughs at. Pa then asks Petunia to do him, which Petunia does, saying "Come on down to Pa Grape's shop! You have to! We're the only store in town!" Everyone laughs once again, before Bacon Bill asks Petunia to do him, which Petunia does, though she says, "I can't do Bacon Bill!", which Bacon Bill doesn't understand. Madame Blueberry then asks Petunia to do her, which Petunia does, saying, "My accent makes everything I say sound delightful!" as everyone laughs once again. Ichabeezer then asks Petunia to do him, which Petunia also does, saying, "I have an unhealthy obsession with my lawn!", everyone laughing once again. Bob tells Petunia that they were wrong and that she is funny, as everyone still continues laughing.
- This episode reveals Petunia can impersonate others, even right down to their voices.
- Surprisingly, no one bothered asking Petunia where she would live if she sold the shop, as Beatbox Bill stated she lives there.