Oh, Santa! is the fifth Silly Song with Larry.

The song is based on Larry waiting for Santa so he can give him his plate of cookies. While doing that, he gets a visit from a bank robber, a viking, and an IRS agent and shares cookies with them (with the exception of the IRS agent until the end).

Lyrics

(The title card appears. It is the same as the original, but is surrounded by a Christmas frame, and Larry is in his pajamas.)

The Announcer: And now it's time for Silly Songs with Larry, the part of the show where Larry comes out and sings a Silly Song. It's Christmas Eve, and Larry is anxiously awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus with a plate of cookies.

Larry: Oh, Santa! I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come, and I've got cookies! Three yummy cookies! Just for you for when you come, oh me, for you for when you come ... because it's Christmas!

(knocks three times)

Larry: Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a cucumber like me, a good cucumber like me?

(Larry opens the door.)

The Announcer: Larry is surprised to be greeted not by Santa, but crafty bankrobber.

Larry: Who are you?

Bankrobber (Scallion 1): I'm a bankrobber! And I've come to rob your bank, oh yes, I've come to rob your bank, and I've come to take your dimes and swipe your nickels. So stand back, step aside you silly pickle! And let me in. (He comes in.)

The Announcer: Although frightened by the intruder, in the spirit of Christmas Larry makes an offering.

(Larry closes the door.)

Larry: I'm not a banker ... I have no bank my robbing friend, but I have cookies--three yummy cookies. And I don't have nickels, but please take this my robbing friend. Eat one of these my robbing friend. They are for Santa, but you may have one... (He takes out his plate of cookies and gives one to the bankrobber.)

The Announcer: The bankrobber is truly touched by Larry's good will. But Larry, although momentarily distracted, is still excited about seeing Santa.

Larry: Oh, Santa! I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come, and I've got cookies! Two yummy cookies! Just for you for when you come, oh me, for you for when you come ... because it's Christmas!

Bankrobber (Scallion 1): (simultaneously) I'm a robber! I came to rob your bank, oh yes! I came to rob your bank ... you shared a cookie--a yummy cookie. Though I'd love to take your dimes, perhaps another time--because it's Christmas!

(knocks three times)

Larry: Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a cucumber like me, a good cucumber like me?

(Larry opens the door.)

Narrator: Once again, it is not Santa who has come to Larry's door, but this time a savage Norseman.

Larry: (surprised) Who are you?

Viking (Pa Grape): I'm a viking! And I've come to take your land, oh yes! I've come to take your land, and I've come to burn your crops and steal your horses. And I've come to ... step on your chickens! And soil your quilts! Oy! (He comes in.)

The Announcer: Although frightened by the intruder, in the spirit of Christmas Larry makes an offering.

(Larry closes the door.)

Larry: I don't have land ... I don't have crops, my viking friend, but I have cookies--two yummy cookies. And I don't have horses, but please take this my viking friend. Eat one of these my viking friend. They are for Santa, but you may have one... (He takes out his plate of cookies and gives one to the viking.)

Narrator: The viking is also touched by Larry's good will. But Larry's thoughts are still with Santa.

Larry: Oh, Santa! I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come, I've got a cookie! A yummy cookie! Just for you for when you come, oh me, for you for when you come ... because it's Christmas!

Viking (Pa Grape): (simultaneously) I'm a viking! I came to take your land, oh yes! I came to take your land ... you shared a cookie--a yummy cookie. Though I'd love to soil your quilts, I don't think that I wilt ... because it's Christmas!

(knocks three times)

Larry: Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a cucumber like me, a good cucumber like me?

(Larry opens the door.)

The Announcer: Larry is greeted now by an agent of the Internal Revenue Service.

Larry: Who are you?

Peach: I'm from the IRS! And I've come to tax your- [Slam!!!]

Larry: Oh, Santa! I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come...

(Santa finally comes through the chimney.)

Larry: It's finally Santa! It's finally him! At last, the one who brings presents for a cucumber like me, a good cucumber like me!

Santa (Bob): I'm Santa! And I've come to bring you gifts, oh yes! I've come to bring you gifts, and I've come to stuff your stockings--oh ho-ho-ho! And I've come to jiggle my belly. And wiggle my...nose? (He turns around and looks at the bankrobber, who is wearing a very familiar hat, and the viking, whose shield has a very familiar belt) Hey, wait a minute! Isn't that my belt?! And what are you doing with my hat?! (gasp) So you're the ones!

Bankrobber (Scallion 1): Wait a minute, I can explain!

Viking (Pa Grape): We've changed!

Santa (Bob): Nobody messes with Santa! You know that don't you?! You've been very naughty, and I've got a list!! (He chases the bankrobber and the viking out the door.)

(The Peach comes back in and sees the last cookie on Larry's plate.)

Peach: Did you claim that?

(Larry shakes his head no, then gives the cookie to the Peach.)

Larry: Merry...Christmas.

(Larry looks at the camera and smiles as the song ends.)

Characters

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • The Internal Revenue Service is the revenue service of the United States federal government, who collect taxes. Mike Nawrocki stated on the commentary he had gotten arrested earlier that year during production, but was free later.

Trivia

  • This is the first Silly Song for several things:
    • The first Silly Song to be aired on TV.
    • The first Silly Song to not have the Announcer book ending it (not counting The Hairbrush Song).
    • The first time Pa Grape had a different mustache, plus the first time he is seen without his glasses.
  • This is Pa Grape's third appearance without his family.
  • The idea of the song came when Mike Nawrocki and his wife watched "Kiss of the Spider Woman" with Chita Rivera where the characters were simultaneously singing different lines.
  • The backdrop was designed by Mike Nawrocki by using Painter 4.
  • This is the longest Silly Song to date, with a run time of five minutes and fourteen seconds.
  • This Silly Song is similar to The Hairbrush Song as certain characters enter the door (all of them are the same ones, except Scallion One is in this Silly Song and Junior isn't, and no applause at the end.) and the announcer narrates between parts of the Silly Song.
  • This, along with Lost Puppies were included as Easter eggs in The Ultimate Silly Song Countdown.
  • This was featured on the PBS airing of The Star of Christmas.
  • In the original version of this song, when Larry slams the door on the IRS agent, Scallion #1 falls over and yells "Oof!". This sound is not in the 1998 version for unknown reasons.

Remarks

  • Larry should know that Santa would come down his chimney instead of his door, as he did in this song.

Goofs

  • Larry's tooth is missing in the title card. Just like in The Song of the Cebu and The Lost Tooth.
  • When Santa tries to come in the first time, his eyelashes clip through the fireplace.
  • When the bank robber falls down for the final time, he clips through the ground.
  • When the Viking and bank robber runs from Santa, the Peach from the IRS can be seen on the left side on the screen behind the door, waiting for the people to exit the room so he can come in.
  • When Santa first talks, the red present is just a 2D model and its bowtie is floating.
  • Some international dubs of this song have Pa Grape's first singing part be entirely spoken and literally translated from English instead.

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