|Off the Rails|
September 23, 2016
Off the Rails is the second half of the fourth episode from the fourth season of VeggieTales in the House.
Bob is driving a train outside of the House then drives it back inside the House again, as it chugs past Ichabeezer, who is taking Rooney for a walk, and past all of the other townspeople in the town center. Bob then tilts his hat in respect to the people, before he resumes controlling the train, blowing the whistle, and throwing a shovelful of coal into the boiler, while saying that this is exhausting, then says that he needs a breather. Bob then stops the train beside Pa Grape's store, then calls out "Last stop!" as the passengers exit the train. Mayor Archibald compliments Bob for his excellent driving then says that he hopes that he can drive their trackless train every day forever. Bob then gets out of the train and says that as much as he loves being the conductor, he needs to take a vacation. Mayor Archibald is surprised when he hears this then asks Petunia what the town rules are about train conductors taking a vacation, Petunia answering that the town rules say that Bob has to appoint a replacement while he's gone. Bob tells Mayor Archibald and Petunia that his bestest pal Larry has always wanted to be a train conductor, but Ichabeezer drives up to Bob and Larry in his segway while telling Bob that he can't put the train in Larry's hands and that he needs an expert conductor.
When Bob asks Ichabeezer who, Ichabeezer answers himself, because he's way more qualified than Larry. Bob tells Ichabeezer not so fast because he gets to pick, so they'll have a contest between Ichabeezer and Larry, then he'll decide who's the most qualified. Petunia agrees with Bob's idea, but tells him not to play favorites, and for him to make sure that he chooses the best candidate. Outside the House, Bob tells Larry and Ichabeezer that each of them will take turns doing a few train tasks and that the one who does the best will be the train conductor. Ichabeezer says that he'll go first, while Bob tells him to start the train and give it a whirl, Ichabeezer saying that whirling is what he does best. Ichabeezer then enters the train cob and starts up the train as the train chugs off and around a tree, past the fence, up the rocks, then chugs around Bob and Larry a few times, before stopping. Ichabeezer then gets out of the train and tells Larry to top that, though Bob tries encouraging Larry that he's got this and for him to just drive the train around nice and easy. Larry tells him no problem, then asks Bob one question, which is "What's a train?", which Bob is surprised to hear, but Larry tells him that he's just kidding and that he's got this. Larry then gets into the train and starts it off without a hitch, as it chugs around a few times, past the fence, and up the rocks and down again, while Bob can give a confident grin to Ichabeezer, who seems exasperated. Larry then chugs back towards Bob and Ichabeezer again, chugging around them again, while Larry says that it's "easy-peasy", but when he stops the train, the force causes Larry to get sent flying until landing in the smokestack of the train.
Ichabeezer laughs when he sees this, while Bob comes up to the train, asking Larry if he's okay. From inside the smokestack, Larry asks Bob how he did then gets out of the smokestack, further asking Bob if he did good or if he did great. Bob next tells Larry and Ichabeezer that he wants them to show him his steering skills, and for them to maneuver the train through a stack of cones. Ichabeezer has his turn first while saying that he loves driving trains, as he manages to steer the train past all of the cones with ease. Ichabeezer next uses the train to steer past the cones all while backing up. After finishing his turn, Ichabeezer tells Larry to beat that, which angers Bob, before he tells Larry that he's up. Larry says that he's ready to do the "cones thing", while Bob tells Larry to remember to focus. Larry says that he got it, before he starts up the train, but then he says that "Sometimes, it's hard to concentrate with so many thoughts going on in my cucumber brain", then decides that maybe if he focuses on making up a song, he won't feel so distracted. Larry then decides to sing a song about animals, before he starts singing a song about different animals and the sounds that they make. Unfortunately, Larry ends up knocking over the cones because he's distracted while singing about animals, even hitting Bob with some of the cones. After the song ends, Larry says that he did it and that he hit all the cones, but Bob tells him that he's supposed to miss them, which Larry is surprised to hear, which causes Bob to fall over in frustration. Ichabeezer then asks Bob what the next test is, Bob answering that it's stopping, as Ichabeezer says that he's the best at stopping.
Ichabeezer manages to pass his stopping test, before it is now Larry's turn to try and stop the train, before he starts the train up again. However, Larry ends up driving the train up a tree, which causes the train to topple backwards, before next driving the train into the pond, then driving the train directly into a trash can, then driving the train into a bush. The train then stops after that, but ends up falling over on its side as Larry comes out and looks around while stating that "Technically, the train is stopped". Ichabeezer insists to Bob that he's clearly the better conductor and for them to get it over with. Back in town, Bob, Larry, and Ichabeezer meet up with Mayor Archibald and Petunia again as Mayor Archibald asks Bob if he made a decision, Bob nervously answering that he has. Bob then looks over at Ichabeezer (who says "The best one!") and Larry (who says "The friend one!"), and because Bob is unwilling to pick Ichabeezer over Larry, picks Larry as his replacement conductor, which Ichabeezer is surprised to hear. Larry then steps forward as Petunia congratulates him for being the town train conductor, while Bob gives Larry his conductor's hat. Larry then jumps into the train conductor while saying that since Bob said it, he's the new train conductor. Ichabeezer angrily accuses Bob of playing favorites, as Bob tries to explain himself, but Ichabeezer can only leave in a huff while saying, "Don't come crawling to me when you need help!" Mayor Archibald asks Larry how he would like to give a ride to his first passengers, which Larry responds to by saying "All aboard!" Bob tells Mayor Archibald and Petunia to have fun while he's off to his vacation. Soon, Larry is driving the train through the House, while telling himself that "this train business" isn't so hard then says that Bob has nothing to worry about.
However, when Larry pulls on the brake lever, it ends up coming loose while he's holding it, as the train starts chugging towards one of the walls of the House, before it starts chugging up the wall, while Larry says, "Not good!" Inside the passenger car, Mayor Archibald asks Petunia if it's just him or if the House is completely sideways, but Petunia tells him that the House isn't sideways, but rather they are sideways. The train then chugs upside-down on the archway of the House, then comes back down again, before chugging up the side of the pantry, then over the sink before chugging out the window of the House. Once landing outside, the train then chugs right through a bush and starts chugging further out into the woods. Out in the woods, Mr. Lunt is camping while roasting a marshmallow, before he sees the train coming his way as it knocks him into the air, while the train still continues chugging non-stop. Bob is now rowing a rowboat in the middle of the ocean, while saying that this vacation is just what he needed, while rowing the boat towards a small island. Bob then gets onto the island and makes himself comfortable while saying, "Now this is relaxing", not realizing that the train is now chugging non-stop around in the ocean on some of the other islands, while also adding that he doesn't have a care in the world. The train then chugs onto another island, before Bob adds that "this is the most perfect, quiet, peaceful-", before he is suddenly hit by the train and finds himself trapped on the train's cowcatcher. Despite this, Bob climbs up the front of the train and enters the train cob to find Larry running around in a panic while repeatedly screaming, "Out of control! Out of control! Out of control!"
Bob manages to stop Larry and get him to calm down then tells Larry to tell him what's going on. Larry calmly answers that they're out of control, before the train then crashes through the bushes again and chugs up the rocks once again before flying back into the House once again. Back inside the train cob, Larry once again runs around in a panic about being out of control, while Bob reminds him to pull the brake lever, but when Bob sees what happened to the brake lever, he asks Larry where it is, before Larry shows him the now-disconnected brake lever. Bob is shocked when he sees Larry holding the brake lever then asks Larry "What did you do to this thing?!" The train then chugs up the wall once again, which causes Bob to fall out of the train cob and roll down into the passenger car and fall out of the caboose, but he manages to keep himself from falling even further. The train then chugs onto the ceiling of the House, conveniently chugging over Ichabeezer's mansion, which causes Bob to realize that he's got to get Ichabeezer, as he falls towards Ichabeezer's mansion and lands in one of the trees in the lawn before falling out of the tree. Bob then approaches the front door of Ichabeezer's mansion and knocks on the door, as Ichabeezer answers it. Ichabeezer angrily yells at Bob to get off his porch, before Bob tells him that he needs his help, while Ichabeezer sarcastically says, "And I need to own the moon!" and that life is hard before closing the door in front of Bob again.
Bob then barges in again, but Ichabeezer places a safe in front of him and claims not to have heard what Bob said. Bob then bursts out from the safe and admits to Ichabeezer that he's the best train conductor, which convinces Ichabeezer to listen, while Bob further admits that he was wrong and he made a mistake, while Ichabeezer says that now he hears him. Bob then further adds that he picked Larry over Ichabeezer even though he knew Ichabeezer was the better conductor and now the train is out of control, then apologizes for playing favorites and asks Ichabeezer to help him. Ichabeezer accepts Bob's plea for help, adding as long as he finally gets to be the train conductor. Outside, the train then chugs out from the chimney of the House, then chugs onto the roof before falling into another tree and down on the ground again. Mayor Archibald and Petunia are now in the train cob with Larry, while Mayor Archibald suggests that they vote for the train to stop, though Larry tells Mayor Archibald that that's his solution for everything. A driving sound is suddenly heard as Petunia asks them if they heard that, before she looks out the window of the train cob to see Ichabeezer's monster truck driving after the train. Bob then drives the monster truck next to the front of the train, before Ichabeezer then jumps inside the train cob, before he holds out a pipe wrench, which he inserts into the hole for the brake lever then pulls on it, while Petunia says that they're headed straight for the pond. Ichabeezer realizes that they're going too fast and that there's not enough room to stop, before he says "We gotta go over!" before pushing forward on the brake lever.
This causes the train to speed up again before it jumps directly over the pond and lands on the other side again. Of course, the force of the landing causes Larry, Mayor Archibald, and Petunia to fall on top of each other while inside the train cob. This time, Ichabeezer pulls back on the brake lever again, which causes the train to come to a complete stop. Mayor Archibald and Petunia come out from the train cob, as does Larry, while Mayor Archibald is happy to be back on the ground again as he picks up a rock and kisses it, but is disgusted by the taste of it. Ichabeezer proudly approaches Larry, just as Bob drives up to them in the monster truck and comes out of the monster truck, telling Mayor Archibald that he played favorites with Larry then further adds that Ichabeezer is the most qualified to be train conductor. Larry agrees with Bob while saying that he never wants to ride on a train ever again then gives the conductor's hat to Ichabeezer, who then puts it on while asking, "Who wants to go for a train ride?!" which Larry is excited to hear. Bob then tells the group, "Now if you'll excuse me", before he puts on his sunglasses again and drives off in the monster truck again to resume his vacation, while Ichabeezer and Larry are riding in the train, driving it at a nice leisurely pace once again all while driving it around in the backyard of the House. Meanwhile, Bob is still enjoying his vacation on the island in the ocean.
- The term train conductor is incorrectly used, as that refers to someone who checks the trains. The correct term should be either engineer or driver, as that is the title to whoever controls the train.
- The title card depicts the train on tracks, but that never happens.
- Larry has trouble stopping the train in the third test, despite he had no issues the first time.
- Characters are often missing in some shots of the train.
- Larry previously had an interest in trains in The Larry Express!.
Moral: Don't Play Favorites because they only make it worse