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LockedOutTitleCard

This is the transcript for Locked Out.

Transcript[]

(Scene opens to Bob and Larry watching TV, when Jimmy and Jerry pass by, Jimmy having garlic nog and Jerry carrying a stack of sandwiches, much to Bob's irritation.)

Jerry: Sandwich.

(Jerry throws a sandwich to Larry, who jumps over Bob and knocks him over, catching the sandwich and eating. Larry then looks down and notices a remote next to Bob's chair.)

Larry: Bob, what's this do?

Bob: Ooh! I can't believe you found that! It's our house-folding remote control!

Larry: House-folding what-what-what?

Bob: I lost it a long time ago. It's why we have to live with this house wide open.

(Camera pans out to show a wide view of Bob and Larry's house, before cutting to across where Ichabeezer is walking Rooney.)

Larry: Then, let's close it.

Bob: Good idea. Ba-bam!

(Bob uses the remote to close the house up.)

Larry: Yes! No more Jimmy and Jerry popping in whenever they want.

Bob: No more entire town seeing me in my undies.

Larry: No more losing half of Bob's sock collection to a gust of wind while using them to build a fort.

Bob: Wait, what?

Larry: Nothing. Finally, some privacy. Can I have a turn?

(Larry takes the remote from Bob and presses the button, but nothing happens. Larry presses the button again, but the house still doesn't open. Larry presses the button a few more times.)

Larry: Come on! Come on!

Bob: Larry, just give it a second. There's no need to freak out.

Larry: But, what if I wanna freak out?

Bob: All freaking out does is cause us to make bad choices. No matter what the problem, just stay calm. Give it to God and go from there.

Larry: (sighs) You're right, Bob.

(The house then opens up after that.)

Bob: See?

(The house suddenly closes as soon as it opens, before it starts opening and closing rapidly in succession.)

Larry: Uh-oh!

Bob: See what you did? Now let's just wait this out!

(The house still opens and closes rapidly, while Larry becomes increasingly freaked out. Finally, Larry can't take anymore.)

Larry: (screaming)

(Larry runs outside, followed by Bob.)

Larry: We gotta stop it!

Bob: Maybe if we prop it open with something!

Larry: Great idea!

(Larry holds the remote in front of the house wall.)

Bob: Not that!

(Too late, as a final slam is heard after that. Larry pulls the remote out as it appears fine, before it suddenly crumbles into tiny pieces.)

Larry: I freaked out, didn't I?

Bob: Uh-huh.

(Bob tries to open the door, but it's locked.)

Bob: Larry, I left my keys in the house. Give me yours.

Larry: I have keys?

Bob: We're locked out!

(Larry becomes shocked and even more freaked out, as steam starts coming out of his invisible ears.)

Bob: No! Larry! I know this is scary, but we can't freak out. Stay calm and we'll be fine.

(Larry calms down again.)

Larry: I'm cool, I'm good.

Bob: We could make a key out of hair.

Larry: (disgusted) Ew. Why don't we just ask Jimmy and Jerry for the spare?

Bob: You gave them a spare key to our house? That would be a bad thing to do, other than now. It's a good thing to do because we need a spare key.

(Bob and Larry head for Jimmy and Jerry's house. Scene switches to Jimmy and Jerry's house, where Jimmy is looking at Happy Sunshine Bubbles.)

Jimmy: Happy Sunshine Bubbles is so cute! Look at her do cute little loop-de-loops!

Jerry: And Danny.

(Jerry is laying on the couch with Danny perched on his stomach, before using his stomach to bounce and flip Danny.)

Jerry: (chuckling) Oh, Danny.

(The doorbell rings, which catches their attention. Jimmy answers the door to find Bob and Larry at the doorway.)

Jimmy: Hi, Bob and Larry! What brings you here?

Bob: We're locked out.

Larry: Please tell me you still have that spare key to our place.

Jimmy: I still have the spare key to our place.

Larry: I mean, I want you to say, "To your place".

Jimmy: To your place.

Larry: I mean, I want you to say, "I still have the spare key to your place".

Jimmy: But you don't have a key to our place. I'd never give a spare key to our place to you and Bob.

Bob: Give us our spare key!

Jimmy: Oh! Yeah! We should have that around here somewhere. It just might take us a bit to find it. Our house is kind of a mess.

Jerry: Needle, haystack.

Jimmy: We'll let you know when we find it.

(Scene switches to Bob and Larry returning to their house.)

Larry: I wouldn't count on them finding that spare key any time this century.

Bob: Okay, we gotta think of something. You think of an idea, I'll think of an idea. One of them is sure to get us in. I'll go first.

(Bob starts thinking really hard, until he comes up with an idea.)

Bob: I got it! First, I'll carefully aim a marble and flick it at a two-mile-long line of dominoes, then the last domino will topple onto a little see-saw made of diamonds, causing a rope to lower a weight onto a toy monster truck.

Larry: A diamond see-saw?

Bob: Stay with me. The monster truck rolls onto a toothpick that is pulled quickly with a rope until we can't see it anymore, then a huge tree comes crashing in and breaks down the door!

Larry: We can't afford a diamond see-saw.

Bob: You're right. Okay, your turn. I hope you came up with something better.

Larry: I came up with a game show!

Bob: Just now?

Larry: Welcome back to "Larry's Pick-A-Door Game Show"!

(Bacon Bill suddenly appears from out of nowhere.)

Bob: What's Bacon Bill suddenly doing here?

Larry: Our contestant, Bacon Bill, was about to pick a door.

Bacon Bill: Hi, mom!

Larry: Okay, Bill, which door is it gonna be? Door Number One? Door Number Two? Or Door Number Three?

Bacon Bill: Oh, boy! I don't know! This is too much pressure!

Larry: (whispering) Bill! Pick Number Three!

Bacon Bill: Oh yeah. Number Three!

Larry: What's behind Door Number Three?

(Game show-style music starts playing as there is no answer.)

Larry: I said, let's see what's behind Door Number Three!

(Bacon Bill becomes increasingly excited and unable to answer. The sound of a buzzer is heard after that.)

Larry: This isn't working either, Bob!

Bob: That was your plan?!

(Bacon Bill comes up to Bob and Larry before standing to the side, showing that he is extremely thin from the side.)

Bacon Bill: If we knew someone thin, he could slide under the door and unlock it from the inside.

Bob: That would probably work, but we don't know anyone who's a walking, talking thin thing.

Bacon Bill: Also, it's too bad we don't have a shark rocket.

Larry: (gasps) Bacon Bill! You have a shark rocket!

Bacon Bill: I'll be right back!

(Bacon Bill runs off to get his shark rocket. Scene switches to back at Jimmy and Jerry's house.)

Jerry: Here, spare key, spare key, spare key!

Jimmy: It's not a dog, Jerry, it's a key! Two completely different species. (grunting) Boy, we sure got a lot of garbage. Oversized cowboy hat, karaoke gumball machine, garbage bag full of garbage. Where is that key?

(The sound of squeaking is heard, before Jerry, who is wearing the cowboy hat, looks over at the source of the sound.)

Jerry: Danny!

(Scene switches to show Danny standing off to the side while holding the key in his mouth. Jimmy and Jerry start to approach Danny slowly.)

Jimmy: Okay, Danny, give us that key.

(Jimmy and Jerry jump out at Danny, but miss as they land on the floor, while Danny hops away with the key.)

Jimmy: Ah! Get back here, Danny!

(Jimmy starts to chase after Danny. Scene switches to Larry pushing the shark rocket.)

Larry: (grunting) Must get in our house!

(Larry pushes the shark rocket in front of the front door of the house, before getting into the cockpit.)

Bacon Bill: I don't know exactly what you're doing, but it seems crazy, so, I approve!

(Bacon Bill sits on the back of the shark rocket, before Larry starts up the ignition.)

Larry: Punch it!

(The shark rocket suddenly starts to rise into the air, but Larry can't control it, just as Bacon Bill falls off, before the shark rocket, with Larry in it, suddenly hits Bob, as the two get sent flying out the window of the House. Cut to Bacon Bill in the kitchen sink.)

Bacon Bill: Whee! Whoo-hoo-hoo! Oh, I'm on the ground. Oh, well. Whee! Whoo-hoo-hoo!

(Scene switches to outside the House, as the shark rocket crashes to the ground outside, sending Bob and Larry tumbling to the ground.)

Larry: Where are we? How do we get back? What did I touch that was wet?!

Bob: If you hadn't freaked out, we wouldn't be in this mess!

Larry: How do you know the problem isn't you're not freaking out enough?!

Bob: Good point. (screaming)

(Scene switches to back in Jimmy and Jerry's house, with Jimmy and Jerry still trying to catch Danny to get the key from him. Danny tries to back away, but stops when Jimmy comes up to him.)

Jimmy: Danny! Give us that key!

(Jimmy and Jerry jump out at Danny, but bump each other, while Danny hops away again. Jerry hops forward then slips on a sock that was on the floor before falling forward and managing to catch Danny.)

Jerry: Gotcha!

(Danny slaps Jerry in the face with his ears before hopping away once again, but Jimmy catches him and takes the key from him.)

Jimmy: Ha! I got ya! Okay, let's go to Bob and Larry's.

(Jimmy slips on a banana peel when he tries to hop forward, causing the key to get sent flying in the air. Jimmy and Jerry try to catch the key, but they bump each other again, just as the key lands right on the guitar, near the edge of the hole. When Jimmy blows on the key, it causes the key to fall into the guitar hole.)

Jimmy: Uh-oh.

(Scene switches to back outside the House, where Bob and Larry have built a shelter.)

Bob: I'm almost finished building the shelter, Larry. How's that fire coming?

(Larry is shown trying to get a fire started on one of the sticks used for building the shelter.)

Larry: I got a spark!

(Bob turns around before becoming shocked when he sees what Larry is doing.)

Bob: No! Stop!

(Too late, as the instant Larry gets the fire started, it causes the shelter to go up in ashes.)

Bob: (gasps, chuckling uneasily)

Larry: Now, Bob. Remember, uh, we don't wanna-

Bob: Freak out? What a wonderful idea! (laughing)

Larry: Uh-oh.

Bob: I'll show you freaking out!

(Bob starts banging his head on the side-step of the House.)

Larry: Bob.

Bob: This is freaking out! Who's got no thumbs and is freaking out?

Larry: I-

Bob: This guy! (laughing)

Larry: Which guy?

Bob: Me! (laughing)

(Scene switches to the lake, as a giant lobster claw raises up out of the water.)

Larry: Bob! We have to remain calm.

Bob: Oh! Now you want to remain calm?! Now that we're out in the middle of nowhere with no heat, no shelter, no nothing! It's your freaking out that got us-

(A growling sound is suddenly heard after that.)

Larry: Did you hear that?

(Another growling sound is heard.)

Bob: There it is again. Sounds like something is out there.

Larry: Or as if Ichabeezer is moving any joint in his body.

(A menacing shadow appears right behind Bob and Larry.)

Bob: I think we should turn around.

Larry: Or we could continue to ignore it and it'll go away. That's how things work, right?

(Bob and Larry turn around to see a giant lobster standing right behind them.)

Both: (screaming)

Larry: Monster!

Bob: Actually, I think it's a giant lobster!

Larry: Oh, okay. Thanks, Bob. That clarification makes everything better.

Both: (screaming)

(Larry, who did an eye pop in fright, zips off, while his eyes still stay in place, before zipping off as well.)

Bob: In there!

(Bob and Larry quickly retreat into a nearby cave, before the lobster reaches into the cave to try and get at them.)

Larry: What do we do?

Bob: I don't know! (sobbing)

(Larry's cell phone rings after that, before he answers it.)

Larry: Hello?

(A split-screen phone call shows up, revealing Jimmy to be the one calling Larry.)

Jimmy: Larry, great news! You don't have to be locked out anymore!

Jerry: Key is out!

Larry: That's great news!

(Jimmy, who was twirling the key, accidentally drops it as it falls into the guitar again.)

Jimmy: Oops! I dropped it again. You're locked out again.

Larry: Oh no.

(Danny hops out of the guitar while holding the key.)

Jimmy: Never mind! I got it back out again! You're good!

Larry: Are you sure?

Jimmy: Yes! I've got the key right here in my-

(Danny hops away with the key before Jimmy can finish his sentence.)

Jimmy: Oops! Danny come back here!

(Jerry dons the cowboy hat and picks up the guitar as he starts playing Mexican-style music, while Jimmy chases after Danny.)

Jimmy: Hey! No! Over here! Danny! Bad bunny! Bad! No! Come back here! Danny! (yelling)

(Jimmy then runs into Jerry after he has finished playing, causing the two to crash off-screen.)

Jerry: (Off-screen) Ow!

(Larry hangs up after that as the call ends.)

Bob: How did we get in this mess?! How?!

Larry: Because I freaked out. You were right, Bob. If I could have just stayed calm from the beginning, we would have made better decisions and not be about to get pinched in the face by a lobster. I'm sorry, Bob.

(The lobster still snaps its claw threateningly while growling.)

Larry: (gasps) Bob! It just came to me! We gotta be calm and not freak out! I remember this time in the third grade when we were studying lobsters, and the teacher said that they can't remember things for more than four seconds.

Bob: Your teacher told you that?

Larry: Don't scream and run around, and the lobster won't hear us, and then it'll go away.

Bob: You got it, buddy.

(Bob and Larry hide behind a rock in the cave, while the lobster still tries to reach at them. Four seconds later, the lobster forgets what it was doing and leaves after that.)

Bob: It worked! He forgot all about us! Brilliant. Can we go home now?

(Larry nods, before he and Bob leave the cave. Scene switches to Bob and Larry meeting up with Jimmy and Jerry, as Jimmy pulls the key out from behind his back.)

Jimmy: Ta-da!

Jerry: Bullseye!

(Bob is able to use the key to unlock the front door.)

Bob: (laughing) Thanks, guys.

Jimmy: Glad we could be of assistance.

Bob: See what happens when we don't freak out?

Larry: (singing) Give God

All your worries and doubts

Bob and Larry: (singing) And don't you freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob: (singing) Believe that things

Are gonna work out

Bob and Larry: (singing) And don't you freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob: (singing) Don't turn a molehill

Bob and Larry: (singing) Into a mountain

Don't turn a little leak

Into a fountain

You'll only make it worse

By worryin' and doubtin'

Go to God in prayer

And leave your worries there

And don't you

All: (singing) Freak out!

(Guitar break)

Larry: (singing) Don't you cry,

Don't you pout

Don't you scream and shout

Bob and Larry: (singing) No, don't you freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob: (singing) Having faith is what it's all about

Bob and Larry: (singing) So don't freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob and Larry: (singing) Don't turn a little cloud

Into a rainy day

Give it time

And you'll see the sun shine

If you will only pray

And don't freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob and Larry: (singing) Freak out!

Jimmy and Jerry: Freak out!

Bob and Larry: (singing) Freak out!

All: Freak out!

Larry: Don't freak out!

(The song ends, before the screen goes dark, ending the episode.)

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