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Larry'sCousinComesToTownTitleCard

This is the transcript for Larry's Cousin Comes to Town.

Transcript[]

(The episode begins with Bob whistling as he enters his house while wearing a black hat, he walks to the closet and puts the hat on Larry albeit he doesn't notice him inside the closet and he shuts the door).

Bob: Huh, I wonder where Larry is.

Larry: (O.S.) Bob. (He opens the door startling a screaming Bob). I need to lay low for a few days. Can you slip a meal under my door now and then? (Shuts the door)

Bob: Will you tell me what's going on? (groans and opens the door) Why are you hiding?

Larry: Hiding? Me? (He shuts the door and a note flies in the hands of Bob)

Bob: Wait a minute. This letter is from your cousin George. He's coming to town? That's great news!

Larry: (coming out of the closet) It is?

Bob: George is one of the most amazing veggies I know. (Pause) Is that why you're hiding?

Larry: (takes off the black hat) Because he's too amazing.

(Fades to when Larry and George were young)

Larry: He learned to ride a bike when he was nine months old, he got his drivers license when he was nine years old, he rode race cars when he was ten, and he got his pilot license when he was twelve months old).

Bob: How is that even possible?

Larry: (pulling out a large book) He graduated top of his class in stunt college. (shoving the book in Bob's face) He discovered 17 new species of Veggiesaurus. He's broken over over 100 world records. He's been to the moon 12 times and Mars twice. How I can measure up?! (Takes the book from Bob) All my life, I wasn't known as Larry. I was known as George's cousin. (He enters back into the closet with the book).

Bob: We know you, Larry. You have friends here who love you. You don't have to live in his shadow.

(As the phone rings, Bob hops offscreen and Larry's head pops from the closet and yells "I'm not here" and shuts the door).

(Bob answers the phone)

Bob: Hello? Oh hi, George. (Larry pops from the closet) Okay I'll let him know. Yes, we'll see you there.

(Larry gasps and dashes back into the closet).

Bob: Your cousin is here. He wants us to meet him for Lunch at Pa's.

Larry: (O.S.) I'm not hungry.

Bob: Come on, Larry. It can't be that bad.

(Larry suddenly pops out randomly vocalizing to ignore Bob as hides again, Bob decides to encourage Larry).

Bob: You know, I hear Pa Grape has those new special edition, holographic, mutant, sardine comics on sale. Huh?

(Larry opens the door with a weird look on his face, he grunts, screams and dashes out the door spinning Bob cut to Pa Grape's store where Pa Grape, Bacon Bill, Tina and Madame Blueberry are gathered while George plays a gentle piano melody).

Madame Blueberry: Oh, splendid! Play play us another, George. You are so talented.

George: How about a little "Flight of the Bumblee" while eating a Tuna Sandwich?

Bacon Bill: I loves Bees in my Tuna sandwich.

(George does just that)

Tina: Larry's cousin is so cool.

(As Madame Blueberry approaches, the door bell jingles as Larry comes in shouting).

Larry: Mutant sardine comic, holographic special, Aah! (He sees George and hides in the shelves).

Bob: Come on, Larry. How bad can it be, Huh? (He stops then backs up in front of George). Wow, he really is amazing!

(As the song ends, he puts the sandwich in the mouth and the veggies claps).

George: Mr. Grape, I'd like to buy floats for everyone here.

(Everyone cheers)

Pa Grape: Hooray! Free floats for all!

Bacon Bill: I wish I had a cousin who could eat a Piano while playing the sandwich, I mean, I wish I had a sandwich that could play a piano while eating my cousin. I mean... what I'm saying is, (to George) will you be my cousin?

(George smiles)

Madame Blueberry: Who'd have thought that Larry would be related to a man of such talent,

(Bob pushes Larry forward put he pushes Bob backward).

Larry: No. Get me out of here! I can't!

(Larry resists and Bob pushes him forward and Larry slips on a banana peel which causes him to run into George and knock over Bill).

George: (hugging Larry) Larry! There you are, cuz.

Larry: Hey, cuz. What you been up to?

George: Well, I went skydiving this morning. Landed just in time to rescue a Bus full of orphans. Oh, and I broke the world record in chainsaw juggling, again.

(Bacon Bill comes in between both Cucumbers)

Bacon Bill: He's so awesome! (Faces them both and sinks down).

George: And now I'm here, how about you?

Larry: (stammers) I ate cereal.

George: Great! Well, I came here to hang out with ya. (Wink) What do you say?

(Larry turns to Bob who winks at him).

Larry: Sure, ol' cuzzy, ol' pal.

George: Let me pay my tab and return a quick call from the president. (George walks away to pay Pa Grape and picks up the phone). Chief. You needed some advice?

Bacon Bill: Larry, your cousin fixed my shark rocket using a paper clip.

Madame Blueberry: He played a violin and piano duet single-handedly. It was superb!

Larry: Yup! He's pretty impressive.

George: Gotta jump. I'll chat at you later, El Presdiento. (to Larry while Bob smiles) Let's do this, cuz! (He winks)

(Larry with a fake smile walks up to George and everyone sighs and blinks).

Larry: Well, what would you like to do? We could play hide-and-seek.

George: Last time I played hide-and-seek, I hid for three years because no one could find me.

Larry: Miniature Golf?

George: I hold 12 world records in miniature golf and eight in ultra-microscopic flea-sized golf.

Larry: Maybe you can think of something else to do. I'm running out of ideas.

George: I broke the world record in coming with things to do nine times.

Larry: Is that all you do? Break world records?

George: As a matter of fact...

(Songs starts up and the veggies start singing)

George! George! We all love George!

George: (singing) I've made a sandwich ten miles tall.

Lived eight years in a shopping mall.

I'm in the books for the loudest sneeze.

I ate three tons of stinky cheese.

Records, world Records, I've won a billion games of checkers.

Well I've taught Irish to Irish setters.

I hold the record for setting records.

Veggies: He holds the records for setting records!

George: (singing) On a tsetse fly, I flew to France.

Taught a thousand fleas to sing and dance.

Though it made me sweat I'm the only one who dared to walk upon the sun.

Records, World Records, Wearing 50 pants and sweaters.

Built a bus, a 30-decker.

I hold the record for setting records.

Veggies: (singing) George! George! We all love George!

George: That's me!

(everyone cheers)

Pa Grape: Hooray! Hooray for George!

Archibald: George, it'd be an honor to have you break one of the town's records,

Madame Blueberry: We could name a street after him.

Bacon Bill: We could name me after him. Hi, I'm George Bacon!

George: What kind of records are there around here to break?

Archibald: Madame will help you find one.

Bacon Bill: I will! Pick me! Pick me!

Madame Blueberry: The picking has been done. Follow me. (She picks up George and and throws him into her car and she enters the car with Bill and Madame shoves Bill in the back seat).

George: Hey, where's Larry?

Carrot (with Mr. Nezzer's voice): Hey! Aren't you George's cousin?

(Larry gasps and groans, fade to Madame Blueberry, George and Bill in the car driving).

Madame Blueberry: The good thing about breaking records in this town is that one one has ever broken any. Ever.

Bacon Bill: (leans forward to George) You could win the record for being my mega all-time homie.

Madame Blueberry: He's trying to break a serious and dignified record, Bill. Not one of your shenanigans.

George: Well I do hold the world record for a funniest joke ever told.

Bacon Bill: Oh! Tell us! Tell us!

Madame Blueberry: Oh! Come on, please! I wanna hear it.

George: All right. A mango, a pineapple, and a --

Bacon Bill: (laughs) A mango and a Pineapple! I get it.

(George and Madame Blueberry are unamused).

George: Wait! Stop the car!

(The car stops)

George: Here's the record I'll break. I'll climb to the top of the house.

(Fade to Larry sighing on the couch).

Bob: Larry, why aren't you out with George?

Larry: He keeps getting carried off by people who think he's amazing.

Bob: I just heard he's planning to break the local climbing record by climbing to the top of the roof. They'll name a street after him if he pulls it off.

(Larry can't believe his ears and jumps off the couch unamused)

Larry: So, he just waltzes into my town, and gets a street named after him? Where's my street, where's your street?!

Bob: Actually, mine's just off Eighth Avenue.

Larry: We get it. He's talented and I'm tired of it. (He runs back to his closet and pulls out his camping supplies with an anchor and he's to the front door).

Bob: You can't keep comparing yourself to him. Those who measure and compare themselves with one another behave unwisely.

Larry: 1st Corinthians 10:11?

Bob: Close. 2nd Corinthians 10:12.

Larry: See? I can't do anything right.

Bob: Where are you going?

Larry: I'm gonna beat George to the top of the and break the record first. Then, they can name a street after me. (He walks out the door and shuts it, and then yells "Larry's Street" and heads out).

(Cut to Ichabeezer, Pa Grape, Tina Celerina, Bacon Bill, and Madame Blueberry gathered around with George and Mayor Archibald outside the house who applaud for him).

Archibald: George Cucumber, we join you in support as you scale the house. May you reach the tippity-top safety.

(all cheering).

George: Thank you all! I have enjoyed my time here and I hope to make you all proud.

(applause)

George: If only my cousin Larry were here--

Larry: (O.S.) Wait!

(The audience steps back as Larry rushes over).

Larry: I'm getting to the top first.

(As suspenseful music starts playing, Larry swings the anchor to the roof and Larry quickly climbs to the top like a madman, all the other veggies approach him).

George: You're doing it wrong, be careful! (He has to think fast, he knows what to do).

Bacon Bill: You know what? This just got crazy!

(Ichabeezer gives him a dirty look while everyone else watches Larry in horror, George tosses the anchor to the roof and follows Larry while the suspenseful music speeds up).

George: Cousin, wait up.

Larry: No way! It's my turn to be the talented one! (He continues grunting his way up).

George: Not if you fall!

(Both cucumbers continue climbing up, suddenly, one of the anchors collapses from the roof and Larry starts screaming, grunting, and swinging around on the rope).

George: Just stay calm!

Larry: Easy for you to say, Mr. World Champion, of the World, why couldn't I get I get a cousin, who isn't good at everything.

(Larry then bumps into George sending him down the rope, he watches in terror as he screams and grabs the rope).

Larry: George.

(Larry's rope snaps in half and he falls and George grabs Larry's rope).

George: Gotcha (groans).

(As George grunts, his rope snaps and both cucumbers scream and fall, thankfully, George grabs Larry and swings an anchor to a tree and they both fly into the pond while everyone else witness this).

Tina: Is all of this supposed to happen?

Bacon Bill: These are some sick stunts, man!

(George pulls himself from the water and pulls Larry out who has a fish in his mouth).

George: Larry? Larry, are you okay?

Larry: (spitting the fish out) Did we make it?

George: We made it 'cuz. We're Alive! We're Alive! (he sits beside Larry as the pond shines, the butterflies flies around and the fly jumps out and into the water, then Larry realizes that he was wrong all along).

Larry: I'm sorry. You would've broke the world record if not for me.

George: Oh I'm just glad you're okay. I didn't realize having me around the others was so hard on you, Larry.

Larry: All my life I was known as George's cousin. I always resented it but--

George: You know what your friends call me? Larry's cousin. They love you. Great achievements or not, they love you.

Larry: I don't resent it anymore, I have a good cousin. I should be thankful.

(They both hug as they fade back to the front of his house).

Larry: Are you sure you can't stay for a few more days?

George: Unfortunately the president says he needs me to fill in for him while he goes golfing for the next few days.

Larry: Gonna miss you, Georgey.

George: You too, cuz. But I'll be back soon. I wouldn't miss it for the world. (He tosses his luggage in his car).

(Bob and Larry smile as they watch George fly off the countertop while a carrot rides a helicopter with him on top of her, George smiles and watches Larry).

Bob: Wow, that guy is really impressive.

Larry: He's the best cousin ever!

(The screen irises out and the episode ends).

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