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(Lyrics)
 
 
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'''Monkey''' is the twenty second [[Silly Songs with Larry]].
 
 
 
Bob and Larry are on a safari, and Larry tells about the differences between a monkey and an ape after hearing it from a zoo expert. He takes the concept too far and Bob tries to correct him.
 
 
 
==Lyrics==
 
Narrator: And now it’s time for Silly Songs with Larry, the part of the show where Larry comes out and sings a silly song. Today Larry and Bob were on a photo safari, hot on the trail of a monkey...or an ape. We don’t know which, hence the song.
 
 
Larry: If it doesn’t have a tail, it’s not a monkey
 
Even if it has a monkey kinda shape
 
If it doesn’t have a tail, it’s not a monkey
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
If it doesn’t have a tail, it’s not a monkey
 
 
Bob: Let’s see if we can catch it on the tape!
 
 
Larry: You can very plainly see if it’s a monkey
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
 
Bob: Look, there it goes, there it goes,
 
I don’t know, I can’t tell if it’s a monkey or an ape!
 
 
Larry: It’s very simple, Bob...If it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
 
Bob: Larry, I’m not so sure...
 
 
Larry: Boogawooga, isn’t that a monkey?
 
 
Bob: Boogawooga, maybe it’s an ape!
 
 
Larry: If it’s a nickel or a salad or a pillow
 
If it doesn’t have a tail 
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
 
Bob: If it doesn’t have a tail?
 
Larry: It’s not a monkey!
 
Bob: Are you sure that’s what you really mean to say?
 
A camera has no tail!
 
Larry: It’s not a monkey
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
 
Bob: ... I think there’s something wrong with your logic, Larry...
 
 
Larry: Well Bob, the lady at the zoo said it, and who am I to tell her that she’s wrong? If there’s a tail, it’s a monkey. No tail; ape. It’s easy!
 
 
Bob: But Larry... a kite has a tail!
 
Larry: Then it’s a monkey
 
 
Bob: A comet has a tail!
 
Larry: It’s a monkey
 
 
Bob: A bubble doesn’t have a...
 
Larry: Then it’s not a monkey,
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey...
 
 
Bob:  It’s an ape?
 
 
Larry: Exactly! I knew you’d catch on!
 
 
Bob: Larry, we might need to talk about this. I don’t think the lady at the zoo meant...
 
 
Larry: Shh! (they duck down) Look, there it goes!
 
 In the trees, follow me! 
 
It’s gotta be a monkey or an ape!
 
I can’t believe it’s true
 
All this time, I’ve searched for you
 
Snap the picture,
 
Take the shot!
 
We’re among the lucky few!
 
We finally did it, Photographer!
 
We’ve discovered what we’re after!
 
Let me look!
 
Is it an ape?
 
 
Bob: Larry... this is a disaster. (they are standing next to a cow)
 
 
Larry: It’s a monkey!
 
 
Bob: Ahem, Larry...that’s a cow. Not a...
 
 
Larry: That was exhilarating! Let’s find more!
 
If it doesn’t have a tail, it’s not a monkey
 
Even if it has a monkey kinda shape
 
If it doesn’t have a tail, it’s not a monkey
 
If it doesn’t have a tail
 
It’s not a monkey, it’s an ape!
 
 
Narrator: This has been Silly Songs with Larry. Tune in next time to hear Bob say...
 
Bob: Larry, you don’t have a tail.
 
 
Larry: I don’t?
 
 
Bob: Nope, and neither do I!
 
 
Larry: I wouldn’t be so sure about that, Bob.
 
 
Bob: What do you mean?
 
 
Larry: Oh, nothin’...
 
 
(Bob starts to walk off...he has a tail)
 
 
==Characters==
 
*[[Bob]]
 
*[[Larry ]]
 
*[[Pa Grape]] (''cameo'')
 
 
==Trivia==
 
*The creature Bob and Larry saw swinging around is actually Pa Grape in his lion costume.
 
 
==Gallery==
 
[[File:MonkeyTitleCard.png|250px|link=Monkey/Gallery]]<br />
 
[[Category:Silly Songs with Larry]]
 
[[Category:Songs]]
 

Latest revision as of 16:46, November 7, 2014

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